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Android, Another One, and Dad: AngryMarn @AngryManTV Had a really proud dad moment today Dropped my oldest off at school at 7:30. Helped her carry her project board to the classroom. She was like You coming back at 8.3O for my presentation?" Told her l couldn't cuz l had a 9am meeting in the office 4:10 PM 3/18/19 Twitter for Android 16.1K Retweets 46K Likes AngryMan @AngryManTV. 23h Replying to @AngryManTV Gave her a hug & kiss, then prayed with her, but knew she was disappointed Drove back home & got dressed for work. Was driving to the Metro when I detoured to her school. Grabbed my work phone & sent an email telling them I'd be in after 10. 16 450 4,026 AngryMan @AngryManTV 23h As hard as I worked with her on that project and rehearsing that presentation I had to be there. I needed to support my baby girl. Work could wait. 916 t49 5,557 AngryMan @AngryManTV 23h I hit her teacher with a Class Dojo (parents know.. LOL) message letting her know I was coming. "Please don't let her present without me there" I said. I got to the school at like 8:45, signed in & ran down the hall t2385 3,894 AngryMan @AngryManTV 23h I walked in the classroom as another young man was doing his presentation. My daughter was sitting there at her desk listening. She saw me and lit up The glow damn near brought tears to my eyes. A big bright smile came to her face Her teacher also saw me and smiled 14 t727 8,838 AngryMan @AngryManTV 23h A few more kids did there presentations and then my daughter was up. Man, listen. She killed it!! Everything we had practiced and then some. She was articulate, spoke clearly and loudly. She answered all questions from other students with ease 93 507 7010 AngryMan @AngryManTV 23h When she finished and sat back down, I walked over to her desk, gave her a quick kiss on the forehead & told her "Amazing job!!" t370 4,236 4 AngryMan @AngryManTV 23h Another one of my partners was there supporting his son. That dude had just got off work after working a 12 hours overnight shift, but was there to see his lil man. I stayed and watched his son's presentation. 520 7009 AngryMan @AngryManTV 23h Afterwards we left and just talked about the sacrifices we make as fathers and how often we're overlooked. I appreciate the brothas in my circle. Great fathers who care 15 738 8,086 AngryMan @AngryManTV 23h I left the school and got to work at like 10:45. I ain't care what nobody had to say. Nothing else mattered. An overwhelming feeling of pride has been with me all day. I look forward to getting home to give her another big hug and listen to her tell her story This is what being a real father is all about! Dads don’t sometimes get recognized so this warmed my heart by WVUGuy29 MORE MEMES
Android, Another One, and Dad: AngryMarn
 @AngryManTV
 Had a really proud dad moment today
 Dropped my oldest off at school at
 7:30. Helped her carry her project
 board to the classroom. She was like
 You coming back at 8.3O for my
 presentation?" Told her l couldn't cuz l
 had a 9am meeting in the office
 4:10 PM 3/18/19 Twitter for Android
 16.1K Retweets 46K Likes
 AngryMan @AngryManTV. 23h
 Replying to @AngryManTV
 Gave her a hug & kiss, then prayed with
 her, but knew she was disappointed
 Drove back home & got dressed for
 work. Was driving to the Metro when I
 detoured to her school. Grabbed my
 work phone & sent an email telling them
 I'd be in after 10.
 16
 450
 4,026
 AngryMan @AngryManTV 23h
 As hard as I worked with her on that
 project and rehearsing that presentation
 I had to be there. I needed to support my
 baby girl. Work could wait.
 916 t49 5,557
 AngryMan @AngryManTV 23h
 I hit her teacher with a Class Dojo
 (parents know.. LOL) message letting
 her know I was coming. "Please don't let
 her present without me there" I said. I
 got to the school at like 8:45, signed in &
 ran down the hall
 t2385
 3,894
 AngryMan @AngryManTV 23h
 I walked in the classroom as another
 young man was doing his presentation.
 My daughter was sitting there at her
 desk listening. She saw me and lit up
 The glow damn near brought tears to my
 eyes. A big bright smile came to her face
 Her teacher also saw me and smiled
 14 t727 8,838
 AngryMan @AngryManTV 23h
 A few more kids did there presentations
 and then my daughter was up. Man,
 listen. She killed it!! Everything we had
 practiced and then some. She was
 articulate, spoke clearly and loudly. She
 answered all questions from other
 students with ease
 93 507 7010
 AngryMan @AngryManTV 23h
 When she finished and sat back down, I
 walked over to her desk, gave her a quick
 kiss on the forehead & told her "Amazing
 job!!"
 t370
 4,236
 4
 AngryMan @AngryManTV 23h
 Another one of my partners was there
 supporting his son. That dude had just
 got off work after working a 12 hours
 overnight shift, but was there to see his
 lil man. I stayed and watched his son's
 presentation.
 520 7009
 AngryMan @AngryManTV 23h
 Afterwards we left and just talked about
 the sacrifices we make as fathers and
 how often we're overlooked. I appreciate
 the brothas in my circle. Great fathers
 who care
 15 738 8,086
 AngryMan @AngryManTV 23h
 I left the school and got to work at like
 10:45. I ain't care what nobody had to
 say. Nothing else mattered. An
 overwhelming feeling of pride has been
 with me all day. I look forward to getting
 home to give her another big hug and
 listen to her tell her story
This is what being a real father is all about! Dads don’t sometimes get recognized so this warmed my heart by WVUGuy29
MORE MEMES

This is what being a real father is all about! Dads don’t sometimes get recognized so this warmed my heart by WVUGuy29 MORE MEMES

Android, Another One, and Dad: AngryMan @AngryManTV Had a really proud dad moment today Dropped my oldest off at school at 7:30. Helped her carry her project board to the classroom. She was like You coming back at 8:30 for my presentation?" Told her I couldn't cuz I had a 9am meeting in the office 20:10 18 Mar 19 Twitter for Android 5,479 Retweets 15.1K Likes AngryMan @AngryManTV 12h Gave her a hug & kiss, then prayed with her but knew she was disappointed. Drove back home & got dressed for work. Was driving to the Metro when I detoured to her school Grabbed my work phone & sent an email telling them l'd be in after 10 97 tl 184 1,384 AngryMan @AngryManTV 12h As hard as I worked with her on that project and rehearsing that presentation, I had to be there. I needed to support my baby girl. Work could wait. O12 t 182 1,956 AngryMan @AngryManTV 12h I hit her teacher with a Class Dojo (parents know... LOL) message letting her know I was coming."Please don't let her present without me there" I said. I got to the school at like 8:45, signed in & ran down the hall AngryMan @AngryManTV 12h I walked in the classroom as another young man was doing his presentation. My daughter was sitting there at her desk listening. She saw me and lit up. The glow damn near brought tears to my eyes. A big bright smile came to her face. Her teacher also saw me and smiled 96 tl 270 3,320 AngryMan @AngryManTV 12h A few more kids did there presentations and then my daughter was up. Man, listen. She killed it!! Everything we had practiced and then some. She was articulate, spoke clearly and loudly. She answered all questions from other students with ease 2 th 188 2,667 AngryMan @AngryManTV 12h When she finished and sat back down,I walked over to her desk, gave her a quick kiss on the forehead & told her "Amazing job!!". 93 t 132 1,535 AngryMan @AngryManTV 12h Another one of my partners was there supporting his son. That dude had just got off work after working a 12 hours overnight shift, but was there to see his lil' man. I stayed and watched his son's presentation. AngryMan @AngryManTV 12h Afterwards we left and just talked about the sacrifices we make as fathers and how often we're overlooked. I appreciate the brothas in my circle. Great fathers who care 96 t 270 2,991 AngryMan @AngryManTV 12h I left the school and got to work at like 10:45 I ain't care what nobody had to say. Nothing else mattered. An overwhelming feeling of pride has been with me all day. I look forward to getting home to give her another big hug and listen to her tell her story 9115 355 5,602 The single most wholesome thread ever
Android, Another One, and Dad: AngryMan
 @AngryManTV
 Had a really proud dad moment today
 Dropped my oldest off at school at
 7:30. Helped her carry her project
 board to the classroom. She was
 like You coming back at 8:30 for my
 presentation?" Told her I couldn't cuz I
 had a 9am meeting in the office
 20:10 18 Mar 19 Twitter for Android
 5,479 Retweets 15.1K Likes
 AngryMan @AngryManTV 12h
 Gave her a hug & kiss, then prayed with her
 but knew she was disappointed. Drove back
 home & got dressed for work. Was driving to
 the Metro when I detoured to her school
 Grabbed my work phone & sent an email
 telling them l'd be in after 10
 97 tl 184 1,384
 AngryMan @AngryManTV 12h
 As hard as I worked with her on that project
 and rehearsing that presentation, I had to be
 there. I needed to support my baby girl. Work
 could wait.
 O12 t 182 1,956
 AngryMan @AngryManTV 12h
 I hit her teacher with a Class Dojo (parents
 know... LOL) message letting her know I was
 coming."Please don't let her present without
 me there" I said. I got to the school at like
 8:45, signed in & ran down the hall
 AngryMan @AngryManTV 12h
 I walked in the classroom as another young
 man was doing his presentation. My daughter
 was sitting there at her desk listening. She
 saw me and lit up. The glow damn near
 brought tears to my eyes. A big bright smile
 came to her face. Her teacher also saw me
 and smiled
 96 tl 270 3,320
 AngryMan @AngryManTV 12h
 A few more kids did there presentations and
 then my daughter was up. Man, listen. She
 killed it!! Everything we had practiced and
 then some. She was articulate, spoke clearly
 and loudly. She answered all questions from
 other students with ease
 2 th 188 2,667
 AngryMan @AngryManTV 12h
 When she finished and sat back down,I
 walked over to her desk, gave her a quick kiss
 on the forehead & told her "Amazing job!!".
 93 t 132 1,535
 AngryMan @AngryManTV 12h
 Another one of my partners was there
 supporting his son. That dude had just got off
 work after working a 12 hours overnight shift,
 but was there to see his lil' man. I stayed and
 watched his son's presentation.
 AngryMan @AngryManTV 12h
 Afterwards we left and just talked about the
 sacrifices we make as fathers and how often
 we're overlooked. I appreciate the brothas in
 my circle. Great fathers who care
 96 t 270 2,991
 AngryMan @AngryManTV 12h
 I left the school and got to work at like 10:45
 I ain't care what nobody had to say. Nothing
 else mattered. An overwhelming feeling of
 pride has been with me all day. I look forward
 to getting home to give her another big hug
 and listen to her tell her story
 9115
 355 5,602
The single most wholesome thread ever

The single most wholesome thread ever

Cute, James Bond, and Shit: LEATHERDOS aerois: glitterdustedwren: somajesticdonki: fearlessjones: naamahdarling: fallen-angel-nightshade: nonbinaryanders: justsomefuckingguy: captcreate: odditymall: The Leatherdos is a hair clip that doubles as a multi-tool that combines 5 different tools in a tiny hair clip: screw-drivers, a wrench, a trolley coin, a ruler, and a cutting edge. —-http://odditymall.com/leatherdos-is-a-hair-clip-multi-tool This some of that James Bond shit. Swiss Army Hairclip Imagine you get kidnapped or some shit, how useful that might be? FINALLY!!! Lightly hot glue a flower to it and you could make it cute and frilly without sacrificing functionality. Low temp hot glue pops right off. this is some Kingsman shit right here @mysterysolver Fun story: I have one of these, and wore it every day while working as a vet assistant at a pet clinic. One day a kitten comes in with a cord knotted around her neck, and everyone’s trying to get it unknotted before she heads in for her spay. I just whip off the hair clip, grab the cord, and slice through it in one go. Everyone stood there, surprised, and stared at the cord in my hand that I just sawed through with a hair clip.  This would be AMAZING if you got kidnapped, or, in this case, a pet gets tangled in something. It’s very light and flexible, but the insides of the teeth are sharp enough to get the job done. Y’all are close, but not quite there. This isn’t James Bond, this isn’t Kingsman; this is some Totally Spies shit we’re looking at, and it’s glorious
Cute, James Bond, and Shit: LEATHERDOS
aerois:

glitterdustedwren:

somajesticdonki:

fearlessjones:

naamahdarling:

fallen-angel-nightshade:

nonbinaryanders:

justsomefuckingguy:

captcreate:

odditymall:

The Leatherdos is a hair clip that doubles as a multi-tool that combines 5 different tools in a tiny hair clip: screw-drivers, a wrench, a trolley coin, a ruler, and a cutting edge.
—-http://odditymall.com/leatherdos-is-a-hair-clip-multi-tool

This some of that James Bond shit.

Swiss Army Hairclip

Imagine you get kidnapped or some shit, how useful that might be?

FINALLY!!!


Lightly hot glue a flower to it and you could make it cute and frilly without sacrificing functionality. Low temp hot glue pops right off.


this is some Kingsman shit right here


@mysterysolver

Fun story: I have one of these, and wore it every day while working as a vet assistant at a pet clinic. One day a kitten comes in with a cord knotted around her neck, and everyone’s trying to get it unknotted before she heads in for her spay.
I just whip off the hair clip, grab the cord, and slice through it in one go. Everyone stood there, surprised, and stared at the cord in my hand that I just sawed through with a hair clip. 
This would be AMAZING if you got kidnapped, or, in this case, a pet gets tangled in something. It’s very light and flexible, but the insides of the teeth are sharp enough to get the job done.

Y’all are close, but not quite there. This isn’t James Bond, this isn’t Kingsman; this is some Totally Spies shit we’re looking at, and it’s glorious

aerois: glitterdustedwren: somajesticdonki: fearlessjones: naamahdarling: fallen-angel-nightshade: nonbinaryanders: justsomefuckinggu...

Apparently, Bad, and Click: Strongly Slightly Not sure/in Slightly Strongly Disagree Disagree between Agree Agree 1. I feel discouraged about the way things are going. goodluckdetective: theseriouscynic: vanillayote: clinicallydepressedpug: jinxasaurus: draggle: slashmarks: rosalinarosee: angst420: tantefledermaus: fromonesurvivortoanother: telegantmess: angryflyingstar: angst420: job applications just keep getting weirder….. pro jobseeking tip: never answer these surveys honestly also a tip: if they have a question like “Everybody steals from work sometimes” answer “disagree.” I found this out when i was working as a hiring manager and the company i worked for started instituting these tests for managerial hires or promotions. My boss and I were promoting someone and she failed the test because she answered that question as “slightly agree” which in the results tells them that she is someone likely to steal because she believes everyone does it. When we asked her about her answer, it turns out she picked what she did because she’s cynical and does assume that people steal but didnt agree with them doing so. she almost sued the company for not promoting her based on that but chose to leave instead. We lost a good employee because corporate decided these tests were a good way to screen for “good” employees.tldr these things are poorly designed, ambiguously worded, and structured in ways that are designed to eliminate people because the intention of the questions is never made clear. these tests are evil. this sounds like an ableist disaster for people who aren’t neurotypical and who struggle with reading signals   When I went to get diagnosed with ADHD, the neuropsychologist couldn’t figure out what was going on, because on paper I’m apparently floridly psychotic.  No, the questions are imprecise, and I am hyper-literal and extremely honest.   “Do you often see things that other people do not see?”  Yes.       The question I was answering:  “Are you especially observant?”      The question the test was actually asking:  “Are you having visual hallucinations?”  “Does your environment ever have special messages for you?”  Yes.        The question I was answering:  “Does the sudden sight of a rainbow during a    bout of doubt and self-loathing make you feel as though the world is trying to cheer you up?”       The question the test was actually asking:  “Do you believe that your toaster is trying to convince you that the neighbors are spying on you?” Five years later, I bombed a psych eval for a park ranger job for the same sort of thing.  Tread carefully, darlings.   ^^^^ that is actually such a huge issue with diagnosis!!!! and I’ve thought I didn’t experience symptoms for ages that I actually clearly had all along because of things being phrased super weirdly and confusingly :( And this is why McDonald’s never called me after I applied Yeah, this is why this kind of thing in job apps needs to be illegal. A lot of discrimination is well hidden. Oh! That explains why even having friends and my then-husband proofread these every time didn’t even work. They may not be as weird as me, but they’re not neurotypical. We all read the questions tantefledermaus mentioned as observational skills! Fuck. This explains why I’ve failed all of these fucking things. My sister said to answer these as if you were a really passive person who relied on management/authority to tell you exactly what to do/think. Protip: my Dad is a hiring manager at Home Depot and he told me the system they use (with the stupidass pointless 500 question quiz) is designed so it filters out people with neutral answers. Several months ago I applied for numerous jobs, each of which required their own dumbass tests. To save time (and my sanity) i would click the “sometimes” or middle option for nearly every question unless it was serious. Nobody every called me back. Hell only 1 of the 8 places i applied to even messaged me back saying “thank you but we have gone with someone else”. Your applications wont even get seen unless you “pass” the quiz. So when all yall do fill out these dumb things be sure to pick strong yes or no answers. Never “maybe” or “slighty agree/disagree” Thank you for that, cause I do that a lot. Like I legit feel neutral on some of those questions. Tumblr with the life hacks It’s really bad for someone who isn’t neurotypical because often, these questions do contain language meant to filter us out. For me, I tend to notice the ones meant to filter out people with ADD, like myself. For example “do you have trouble focusing on one task” or “do you like to move around.” My normal answers to these would be “yes, but I have it under control” and “of course, no one can sit still for hours”. But corporations read them as “do not hire” It’s a bunch of BS. So I answer them like a yes man from office space. Works pretty well.
Apparently, Bad, and Click: Strongly Slightly Not sure/in Slightly Strongly
 Disagree Disagree between Agree
 Agree
 1. I feel discouraged about the way things are going.
goodluckdetective:
theseriouscynic:

vanillayote:

clinicallydepressedpug:

jinxasaurus:

draggle:

slashmarks:

rosalinarosee:

angst420:

tantefledermaus:

fromonesurvivortoanother:

telegantmess:

angryflyingstar:

angst420:

job applications just keep getting weirder…..

pro jobseeking tip: never answer these surveys honestly

also a tip: if they have a question like “Everybody steals from work sometimes” answer “disagree.” I found this out when i was working as a hiring manager and the company i worked for started instituting these tests for managerial hires or promotions. My boss and I were promoting someone and she failed the test because she answered that question as “slightly agree” which in the results tells them that she is someone likely to steal because she believes everyone does it. When we asked her about her answer, it turns out she picked what she did because she’s cynical and does assume that people steal but didnt agree with them doing so. she almost sued the company for not promoting her based on that but chose to leave instead. We lost a good employee because corporate decided these tests were a good way to screen for “good” employees.tldr these things are poorly designed, ambiguously worded, and structured in ways that are designed to eliminate people because the intention of the questions is never made clear. these tests are evil.

this sounds like an ableist disaster for people who aren’t neurotypical and who struggle with reading signals 

 When I went to get diagnosed with ADHD, the neuropsychologist couldn’t figure out what was going on, because on paper I’m apparently floridly psychotic.  No, the questions are imprecise, and I am hyper-literal and extremely honest.  
“Do you often see things that other people do not see?”  Yes. 
     The question I was answering:  “Are you especially observant?”
     The question the test was actually asking:  “Are you having visual hallucinations?” 
“Does your environment ever have special messages for you?”  Yes.  
     The question I was answering:  “Does the sudden sight of a rainbow during a    bout of doubt and self-loathing make you feel as though the world is trying to cheer you up?”
      The question the test was actually asking:  “Do you believe that your toaster is trying to convince you that the neighbors are spying on you?”
Five years later, I bombed a psych eval for a park ranger job for the same sort of thing.  Tread carefully, darlings.  

^^^^ that is actually such a huge issue with diagnosis!!!! and I’ve thought I didn’t experience symptoms for ages that I actually clearly had all along because of things being phrased super weirdly and confusingly :(

And this is why McDonald’s never called me after I applied

Yeah, this is why this kind of thing in job apps needs to be illegal. A lot of discrimination is well hidden.

Oh!  That explains why even having friends and my then-husband proofread these every time didn’t even work.  They may not be as weird as me, but they’re not neurotypical.  We all read the questions tantefledermaus mentioned as observational skills!

Fuck. This explains why I’ve failed all of these fucking things.

My sister said to answer these as if you were a really passive person who relied on management/authority to tell you exactly what to do/think. 

Protip: my Dad is a hiring manager at Home Depot and he told me the system they use (with the stupidass pointless 500 question quiz) is designed so it filters out people with neutral answers. Several months ago I applied for numerous jobs, each of which required their own dumbass tests. To save time (and my sanity) i would click the “sometimes” or middle option for nearly every question unless it was serious. Nobody every called me back. Hell only 1 of the 8 places i applied to even messaged me back saying “thank you but we have gone with someone else”. Your applications wont even get seen unless you “pass” the quiz. 
So when all yall do fill out these dumb things be sure to pick strong yes or no answers. Never “maybe” or “slighty agree/disagree”

Thank you for that, cause I do that a lot. Like I legit feel neutral on some of those questions. Tumblr with the life hacks

It’s really bad for someone who isn’t neurotypical because often, these questions do contain language meant to filter us out.
For me, I tend to notice the ones meant to filter out people with ADD, like myself. For example “do you have trouble focusing on one task” or “do you like to move around.” My normal answers to these would be “yes, but I have it under control” and “of course, no one can sit still for hours”. But corporations read them as “do not hire”
It’s a bunch of BS. So I answer them like a yes man from office space. Works pretty well.

goodluckdetective: theseriouscynic: vanillayote: clinicallydepressedpug: jinxasaurus: draggle: slashmarks: rosalinarosee: angst420: ...

Apparently, Bad, and Click: Strongly Slightly Not sure/in Slightly Strongly Disagree Disagree between Agree Agree 1. I feel discouraged about the way things are going. goodluckdetective: theseriouscynic: vanillayote: clinicallydepressedpug: jinxasaurus: draggle: slashmarks: rosalinarosee: angst420: tantefledermaus: fromonesurvivortoanother: telegantmess: angryflyingstar: angst420: job applications just keep getting weirder….. pro jobseeking tip: never answer these surveys honestly also a tip: if they have a question like “Everybody steals from work sometimes” answer “disagree.” I found this out when i was working as a hiring manager and the company i worked for started instituting these tests for managerial hires or promotions. My boss and I were promoting someone and she failed the test because she answered that question as “slightly agree” which in the results tells them that she is someone likely to steal because she believes everyone does it. When we asked her about her answer, it turns out she picked what she did because she’s cynical and does assume that people steal but didnt agree with them doing so. she almost sued the company for not promoting her based on that but chose to leave instead. We lost a good employee because corporate decided these tests were a good way to screen for “good” employees.tldr these things are poorly designed, ambiguously worded, and structured in ways that are designed to eliminate people because the intention of the questions is never made clear. these tests are evil. this sounds like an ableist disaster for people who aren’t neurotypical and who struggle with reading signals   When I went to get diagnosed with ADHD, the neuropsychologist couldn’t figure out what was going on, because on paper I’m apparently floridly psychotic.  No, the questions are imprecise, and I am hyper-literal and extremely honest.   “Do you often see things that other people do not see?”  Yes.       The question I was answering:  “Are you especially observant?”      The question the test was actually asking:  “Are you having visual hallucinations?”  “Does your environment ever have special messages for you?”  Yes.        The question I was answering:  “Does the sudden sight of a rainbow during a    bout of doubt and self-loathing make you feel as though the world is trying to cheer you up?”       The question the test was actually asking:  “Do you believe that your toaster is trying to convince you that the neighbors are spying on you?” Five years later, I bombed a psych eval for a park ranger job for the same sort of thing.  Tread carefully, darlings.   ^^^^ that is actually such a huge issue with diagnosis!!!! and I’ve thought I didn’t experience symptoms for ages that I actually clearly had all along because of things being phrased super weirdly and confusingly :( And this is why McDonald’s never called me after I applied Yeah, this is why this kind of thing in job apps needs to be illegal. A lot of discrimination is well hidden. Oh! That explains why even having friends and my then-husband proofread these every time didn’t even work. They may not be as weird as me, but they’re not neurotypical. We all read the questions tantefledermaus mentioned as observational skills! Fuck. This explains why I’ve failed all of these fucking things. My sister said to answer these as if you were a really passive person who relied on management/authority to tell you exactly what to do/think. Protip: my Dad is a hiring manager at Home Depot and he told me the system they use (with the stupidass pointless 500 question quiz) is designed so it filters out people with neutral answers. Several months ago I applied for numerous jobs, each of which required their own dumbass tests. To save time (and my sanity) i would click the “sometimes” or middle option for nearly every question unless it was serious. Nobody every called me back. Hell only 1 of the 8 places i applied to even messaged me back saying “thank you but we have gone with someone else”. Your applications wont even get seen unless you “pass” the quiz. So when all yall do fill out these dumb things be sure to pick strong yes or no answers. Never “maybe” or “slighty agree/disagree” Thank you for that, cause I do that a lot. Like I legit feel neutral on some of those questions. Tumblr with the life hacks It’s really bad for someone who isn’t neurotypical because often, these questions do contain language meant to filter us out. For me, I tend to notice the ones meant to filter out people with ADD, like myself. For example “do you have trouble focusing on one task” or “do you like to move around.” My normal answers to these would be “yes, but I have it under control” and “of course, no one can sit still for hours”. But corporations read them as “do not hire” It’s a bunch of BS. So I answer them like a yes man from office space. Works pretty well.
Apparently, Bad, and Click: Strongly Slightly Not sure/in Slightly Strongly
 Disagree Disagree between Agree
 Agree
 1. I feel discouraged about the way things are going.
goodluckdetective:
theseriouscynic:

vanillayote:

clinicallydepressedpug:

jinxasaurus:

draggle:

slashmarks:

rosalinarosee:

angst420:

tantefledermaus:

fromonesurvivortoanother:

telegantmess:

angryflyingstar:

angst420:

job applications just keep getting weirder…..

pro jobseeking tip: never answer these surveys honestly

also a tip: if they have a question like “Everybody steals from work sometimes” answer “disagree.” I found this out when i was working as a hiring manager and the company i worked for started instituting these tests for managerial hires or promotions. My boss and I were promoting someone and she failed the test because she answered that question as “slightly agree” which in the results tells them that she is someone likely to steal because she believes everyone does it. When we asked her about her answer, it turns out she picked what she did because she’s cynical and does assume that people steal but didnt agree with them doing so. she almost sued the company for not promoting her based on that but chose to leave instead. We lost a good employee because corporate decided these tests were a good way to screen for “good” employees.tldr these things are poorly designed, ambiguously worded, and structured in ways that are designed to eliminate people because the intention of the questions is never made clear. these tests are evil.

this sounds like an ableist disaster for people who aren’t neurotypical and who struggle with reading signals 

 When I went to get diagnosed with ADHD, the neuropsychologist couldn’t figure out what was going on, because on paper I’m apparently floridly psychotic.  No, the questions are imprecise, and I am hyper-literal and extremely honest.  
“Do you often see things that other people do not see?”  Yes. 
     The question I was answering:  “Are you especially observant?”
     The question the test was actually asking:  “Are you having visual hallucinations?” 
“Does your environment ever have special messages for you?”  Yes.  
     The question I was answering:  “Does the sudden sight of a rainbow during a    bout of doubt and self-loathing make you feel as though the world is trying to cheer you up?”
      The question the test was actually asking:  “Do you believe that your toaster is trying to convince you that the neighbors are spying on you?”
Five years later, I bombed a psych eval for a park ranger job for the same sort of thing.  Tread carefully, darlings.  

^^^^ that is actually such a huge issue with diagnosis!!!! and I’ve thought I didn’t experience symptoms for ages that I actually clearly had all along because of things being phrased super weirdly and confusingly :(

And this is why McDonald’s never called me after I applied

Yeah, this is why this kind of thing in job apps needs to be illegal. A lot of discrimination is well hidden.

Oh!  That explains why even having friends and my then-husband proofread these every time didn’t even work.  They may not be as weird as me, but they’re not neurotypical.  We all read the questions tantefledermaus mentioned as observational skills!

Fuck. This explains why I’ve failed all of these fucking things.

My sister said to answer these as if you were a really passive person who relied on management/authority to tell you exactly what to do/think. 

Protip: my Dad is a hiring manager at Home Depot and he told me the system they use (with the stupidass pointless 500 question quiz) is designed so it filters out people with neutral answers. Several months ago I applied for numerous jobs, each of which required their own dumbass tests. To save time (and my sanity) i would click the “sometimes” or middle option for nearly every question unless it was serious. Nobody every called me back. Hell only 1 of the 8 places i applied to even messaged me back saying “thank you but we have gone with someone else”. Your applications wont even get seen unless you “pass” the quiz. 
So when all yall do fill out these dumb things be sure to pick strong yes or no answers. Never “maybe” or “slighty agree/disagree”

Thank you for that, cause I do that a lot. Like I legit feel neutral on some of those questions. Tumblr with the life hacks

It’s really bad for someone who isn’t neurotypical because often, these questions do contain language meant to filter us out.
For me, I tend to notice the ones meant to filter out people with ADD, like myself. For example “do you have trouble focusing on one task” or “do you like to move around.” My normal answers to these would be “yes, but I have it under control” and “of course, no one can sit still for hours”. But corporations read them as “do not hire”
It’s a bunch of BS. So I answer them like a yes man from office space. Works pretty well.

goodluckdetective: theseriouscynic: vanillayote: clinicallydepressedpug: jinxasaurus: draggle: slashmarks: rosalinarosee: angst420: ...

Dude, Fafsa, and Lawyer: Can you marry me 5:01 PM I just got back from my school and they said they cannot give me any aid except for unsubsidised loans unless l have a child, get married, or turn 24, so I have to get married Yeah ok I'll marry you I need a better fafsa application too Wait seriously Would you really do it Im doing actual research on it Are we doing this It would have to happen like lightning fast cause my next semester happens pretty damn soon I don't know how fast this happens lemme check Ughhhh okay so we'd need to get a marriage license which can be up to $30 depending on where we get it, and THEN we need to file for a marriage certificate I'm an ordained minister but idk if I could file my own marriage certificate get ordained and do it Can we go to Indiana? Let me check Dude Im so excited Its possible that I can get FAFSA to pay for an entire apartment for me to go to school in Milwaukee DUDE WHAT Okay so there's no minister registration required in lllinois so Yeah I'm looking that up right now Ive heard that if one partner commits adultery, thats grounds for a quicker divorce Yeah this sample form I'm looking at says "irretrievable breakdown" of marriage Worse comes to worse we can stage a fight but I think we can just say yeah it's not working out Does it include adultery divorce ranging from $15,000 to $30,000. Most of this money is spent on legal fees. So Fuck lawyers We don't need a lawyer We don't have kids we don't have property to divide up Oh thats only for a lawyer We don't have alimony to negotiate We're just two guys being dudes. Gettin a divorce portraitofemmy: possiblestoner: marzipanandminutiae: A. imagine your otp B. dear gods this country has massive issues I’ve been looking for this post for ages listen, I’ve read enough fanfic to know that they’re not getting divorced, but it’ll take about 35k of pining to figure that out.
Dude, Fafsa, and Lawyer: Can you marry me
 5:01 PM
 I just got back from my school
 and they said they cannot give
 me any aid except for
 unsubsidised loans unless l
 have a child, get married, or
 turn 24, so I have to get married
 Yeah ok I'll marry you I need a
 better fafsa application too
 Wait seriously
 Would you really do it
 Im doing actual research on it

 Are we doing this
 It would have to happen like
 lightning fast cause my next
 semester happens pretty
 damn soon
 I don't know how fast this
 happens lemme check
 Ughhhh okay so we'd need to get
 a marriage license which can be
 up to $30 depending on where we
 get it, and THEN we need to file
 for a marriage certificate
 I'm an ordained minister but idk if
 I could file my own marriage
 certificate

 get ordained and do it
 Can we go to Indiana?
 Let me check
 Dude Im so excited
 Its possible that I can get
 FAFSA to pay for an entire
 apartment for me to go to
 school in Milwaukee
 DUDE WHAT
 Okay so there's no minister
 registration required in lllinois so

 Yeah I'm looking that up right
 now
 Ive heard that if one partner
 commits adultery, thats
 grounds for a quicker divorce
 Yeah this sample form I'm
 looking at says "irretrievable
 breakdown" of marriage
 Worse comes to worse we can
 stage a fight but I think we can
 just say yeah it's not working out
 Does it include adultery

 divorce ranging from $15,000
 to $30,000. Most of this money
 is spent on legal fees.
 So Fuck lawyers
 We don't need a lawyer
 We don't have kids we don't have
 property to divide up
 Oh thats only for a lawyer
 We don't have alimony to
 negotiate
 We're just two guys being dudes.
 Gettin a divorce
portraitofemmy:

possiblestoner:

marzipanandminutiae:

A. imagine your otp
B. dear gods this country has massive issues

I’ve been looking for this post for ages

listen, I’ve read enough fanfic to know that they’re not getting divorced, but it’ll take about 35k of pining to figure that out.

portraitofemmy: possiblestoner: marzipanandminutiae: A. imagine your otp B. dear gods this country has massive issues I’ve been looking ...