torn


                    
                    
                

                

                

            

        
    







            

            
            

                

                    
                

                

                    

                        


	

	
    
        

            

                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        Saucing
        

            
            Saucing
        

    

    

         
Saucing

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        Happy Birthday Buddy
        

            
            Happy Birthday Buddy
        

    

    

         
Happy Birthday Buddy

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        Voting For Trump
        

            
            Voting For Trump
        

    

    

         
Voting For Trump

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        Banae
        

            
            Banae
        

    

    

         
Banae

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

         apartment
        

            
             apartment
        

    

    

         
 apartment

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

         bleeding
        

            
             bleeding
        

    

    

         
 bleeding

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

         40 yards
        

            
             40 yards
        

    

    

         
 40 yards

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        momentous
        

            
            momentous
        

    

    

         
momentous

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        dashing
        

            
            dashing
        

    

    

         
dashing

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        thrown
        

            
            thrown
        

    

    

         
thrown

    



                
            

        

    
    

        🔥 | Latest
    

    
    

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                




    Being Alone, College, and Computers: Philadelphia NEWS .
 RESTAURANTS
 HEALTH-
 WE G SITI[+
 REAL ESIATE & HEUE·
 1HINGS 10 De-
 酉EDDING-
 BEST 0F PEILLY
 MAGAZINE
 Q
 Besides, the impetus seemed righteous. In a world torn asunder by the
 Great Depression, the Holocaust, and two World Wars, our citizenry
 needed to come together, be united, rally behind a collective vision of
 what it meant to be an American: You lived in a single-family house. you
 drove a station wagon, you wore bowling shirts and blue jeans, and you
 slathered mayonnaise on everything from BLTs to burgers to pastrami on
 rye. How do you think "Hold the mayo" became a saying? There was
 aluays mayo, and if you were some kind of deviant who didn't want it,
 you had to say so out loud
 MY SON İAKE, who's 25, eats mayo. He's a practical young man who
 works in computers and adores macaroni salad. He's a good son. I also
 have a daughter. She was a women's and gender studies major in college.
 Naturally, she loathes mayonnaise. And she's not alone. Ask the young
 people you know their opinion of mayo, and you'll be shocked by the
 depths of their emotion. Oh, there's the occasional outlier, like Jake. But
 for the most part, today's youth would sooner get their news from an
 actual paper newspaper than ingest mayonnaise
 The origins of this contentious condiment are hotly debated. Is its name
 derived from the city of Mahon on the Balearic Island of Menorca, where
 the Duc de Richelieu's chef, unable to find cream for a sauce to celebrate
 his lordship's successful siege during the Seven Years War, substituted an
 emulsion of eggs and ol? Or is it a bastardization of Bayonnaise, fronm
polyglotplatypus:please listen to this poor man losing his shit as he reads an article blaming millenials for killing the mayonnaise industry that was written by a babyboomer upset people don’t want to eat her bland salads anymore
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Being Alone, College, and Computers: Philadelphia NEWS .
 RESTAURANTS
 HEALTH-
 WE G SITI[+
 REAL ESIATE & HEUE·
 1HINGS 10 De-
 酉EDDING-
 BEST 0F PEILLY
 MAGAZINE
 Q
 Besides, the impetus seemed righteous. In a world torn asunder by the
 Great Depression, the Holocaust, and two World Wars, our citizenry
 needed to come together, be united, rally behind a collective vision of
 what it meant to be an American: You lived in a single-family house. you
 drove a station wagon, you wore bowling shirts and blue jeans, and you
 slathered mayonnaise on everything from BLTs to burgers to pastrami on
 rye. How do you think "Hold the mayo" became a saying? There was
 aluays mayo, and if you were some kind of deviant who didn't want it,
 you had to say so out loud
 MY SON İAKE, who's 25, eats mayo. He's a practical young man who
 works in computers and adores macaroni salad. He's a good son. I also
 have a daughter. She was a women's and gender studies major in college.
 Naturally, she loathes mayonnaise. And she's not alone. Ask the young
 people you know their opinion of mayo, and you'll be shocked by the
 depths of their emotion. Oh, there's the occasional outlier, like Jake. But
 for the most part, today's youth would sooner get their news from an
 actual paper newspaper than ingest mayonnaise
 The origins of this contentious condiment are hotly debated. Is its name
 derived from the city of Mahon on the Balearic Island of Menorca, where
 the Duc de Richelieu's chef, unable to find cream for a sauce to celebrate
 his lordship's successful siege during the Seven Years War, substituted an
 emulsion of eggs and ol? Or is it a bastardization of Bayonnaise, fronm
polyglotplatypus:please listen to this poor man losing his shit as he reads an article blaming millenials for killing the mayonnaise industry that was written by a babyboomer upset people don’t want to eat her bland salads anymore
                
                

                
            

            
            
polyglotplatypus:please listen to this poor man losing his shit as he reads an article blaming millenials for killing the mayonnaise industr...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                




    Being Alone, College, and Computers: Philadelphia NEWS .
 RESTAURANTS
 HEALTH-
 WE G SITI[+
 REAL ESIATE & HEUE·
 1HINGS 10 De-
 酉EDDING-
 BEST 0F PEILLY
 MAGAZINE
 Q
 Besides, the impetus seemed righteous. In a world torn asunder by the
 Great Depression, the Holocaust, and two World Wars, our citizenry
 needed to come together, be united, rally behind a collective vision of
 what it meant to be an American: You lived in a single-family house. you
 drove a station wagon, you wore bowling shirts and blue jeans, and you
 slathered mayonnaise on everything from BLTs to burgers to pastrami on
 rye. How do you think "Hold the mayo" became a saying? There was
 aluays mayo, and if you were some kind of deviant who didn't want it,
 you had to say so out loud
 MY SON İAKE, who's 25, eats mayo. He's a practical young man who
 works in computers and adores macaroni salad. He's a good son. I also
 have a daughter. She was a women's and gender studies major in college.
 Naturally, she loathes mayonnaise. And she's not alone. Ask the young
 people you know their opinion of mayo, and you'll be shocked by the
 depths of their emotion. Oh, there's the occasional outlier, like Jake. But
 for the most part, today's youth would sooner get their news from an
 actual paper newspaper than ingest mayonnaise
 The origins of this contentious condiment are hotly debated. Is its name
 derived from the city of Mahon on the Balearic Island of Menorca, where
 the Duc de Richelieu's chef, unable to find cream for a sauce to celebrate
 his lordship's successful siege during the Seven Years War, substituted an
 emulsion of eggs and ol? Or is it a bastardization of Bayonnaise, fronm
polyglotplatypus:please listen to this poor man losing his shit as he reads an article blaming millenials for killing the mayonnaise industry that was written by a babyboomer upset people don’t want to eat her bland salads anymore
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Being Alone, College, and Computers: Philadelphia NEWS .
 RESTAURANTS
 HEALTH-
 WE G SITI[+
 REAL ESIATE & HEUE·
 1HINGS 10 De-
 酉EDDING-
 BEST 0F PEILLY
 MAGAZINE
 Q
 Besides, the impetus seemed righteous. In a world torn asunder by the
 Great Depression, the Holocaust, and two World Wars, our citizenry
 needed to come together, be united, rally behind a collective vision of
 what it meant to be an American: You lived in a single-family house. you
 drove a station wagon, you wore bowling shirts and blue jeans, and you
 slathered mayonnaise on everything from BLTs to burgers to pastrami on
 rye. How do you think "Hold the mayo" became a saying? There was
 aluays mayo, and if you were some kind of deviant who didn't want it,
 you had to say so out loud
 MY SON İAKE, who's 25, eats mayo. He's a practical young man who
 works in computers and adores macaroni salad. He's a good son. I also
 have a daughter. She was a women's and gender studies major in college.
 Naturally, she loathes mayonnaise. And she's not alone. Ask the young
 people you know their opinion of mayo, and you'll be shocked by the
 depths of their emotion. Oh, there's the occasional outlier, like Jake. But
 for the most part, today's youth would sooner get their news from an
 actual paper newspaper than ingest mayonnaise
 The origins of this contentious condiment are hotly debated. Is its name
 derived from the city of Mahon on the Balearic Island of Menorca, where
 the Duc de Richelieu's chef, unable to find cream for a sauce to celebrate
 his lordship's successful siege during the Seven Years War, substituted an
 emulsion of eggs and ol? Or is it a bastardization of Bayonnaise, fronm
polyglotplatypus:please listen to this poor man losing his shit as he reads an article blaming millenials for killing the mayonnaise industry that was written by a babyboomer upset people don’t want to eat her bland salads anymore
                
                

                
            

            
            
polyglotplatypus:please listen to this poor man losing his shit as he reads an article blaming millenials for killing the mayonnaise industr...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                




    Being Alone, College, and Computers: Philadelphia NEWS .
 RESTAURANTS
 HEALTH-
 WE G SITI[+
 REAL ESIATE & HEUE·
 1HINGS 10 De-
 酉EDDING-
 BEST 0F PEILLY
 MAGAZINE
 Q
 Besides, the impetus seemed righteous. In a world torn asunder by the
 Great Depression, the Holocaust, and two World Wars, our citizenry
 needed to come together, be united, rally behind a collective vision of
 what it meant to be an American: You lived in a single-family house. you
 drove a station wagon, you wore bowling shirts and blue jeans, and you
 slathered mayonnaise on everything from BLTs to burgers to pastrami on
 rye. How do you think "Hold the mayo" became a saying? There was
 aluays mayo, and if you were some kind of deviant who didn't want it,
 you had to say so out loud
 MY SON İAKE, who's 25, eats mayo. He's a practical young man who
 works in computers and adores macaroni salad. He's a good son. I also
 have a daughter. She was a women's and gender studies major in college.
 Naturally, she loathes mayonnaise. And she's not alone. Ask the young
 people you know their opinion of mayo, and you'll be shocked by the
 depths of their emotion. Oh, there's the occasional outlier, like Jake. But
 for the most part, today's youth would sooner get their news from an
 actual paper newspaper than ingest mayonnaise
 The origins of this contentious condiment are hotly debated. Is its name
 derived from the city of Mahon on the Balearic Island of Menorca, where
 the Duc de Richelieu's chef, unable to find cream for a sauce to celebrate
 his lordship's successful siege during the Seven Years War, substituted an
 emulsion of eggs and ol? Or is it a bastardization of Bayonnaise, fronm
ouyangdan:
negamewtwo:

polyglotplatypus:
please listen to this poor man losing his shit as he reads an article blaming millenials for killing the mayonnaise industry that was written by a babyboomer upset people don’t want to eat her bland salads anymore
PLEASE TURN THE SOUND ON

OH MY GOD

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Being Alone, College, and Computers: Philadelphia NEWS .
 RESTAURANTS
 HEALTH-
 WE G SITI[+
 REAL ESIATE & HEUE·
 1HINGS 10 De-
 酉EDDING-
 BEST 0F PEILLY
 MAGAZINE
 Q
 Besides, the impetus seemed righteous. In a world torn asunder by the
 Great Depression, the Holocaust, and two World Wars, our citizenry
 needed to come together, be united, rally behind a collective vision of
 what it meant to be an American: You lived in a single-family house. you
 drove a station wagon, you wore bowling shirts and blue jeans, and you
 slathered mayonnaise on everything from BLTs to burgers to pastrami on
 rye. How do you think "Hold the mayo" became a saying? There was
 aluays mayo, and if you were some kind of deviant who didn't want it,
 you had to say so out loud
 MY SON İAKE, who's 25, eats mayo. He's a practical young man who
 works in computers and adores macaroni salad. He's a good son. I also
 have a daughter. She was a women's and gender studies major in college.
 Naturally, she loathes mayonnaise. And she's not alone. Ask the young
 people you know their opinion of mayo, and you'll be shocked by the
 depths of their emotion. Oh, there's the occasional outlier, like Jake. But
 for the most part, today's youth would sooner get their news from an
 actual paper newspaper than ingest mayonnaise
 The origins of this contentious condiment are hotly debated. Is its name
 derived from the city of Mahon on the Balearic Island of Menorca, where
 the Duc de Richelieu's chef, unable to find cream for a sauce to celebrate
 his lordship's successful siege during the Seven Years War, substituted an
 emulsion of eggs and ol? Or is it a bastardization of Bayonnaise, fronm
ouyangdan:
negamewtwo:

polyglotplatypus:
please listen to this poor man losing his shit as he reads an article blaming millenials for killing the mayonnaise industry that was written by a babyboomer upset people don’t want to eat her bland salads anymore
PLEASE TURN THE SOUND ON

OH MY GOD

                
                

                
            

            
            
ouyangdan:
negamewtwo:

polyglotplatypus:
please listen to this poor man losing his shit as he reads an article blaming millenials for killi...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                




    Crying, Family, and Guns: Chwistopher
 @Loudwindow
 Concept: Pirates slay a monster mermaid
 to steal its treasure chest.
 Pirates open chest, finds a sleepy baby
 mermaid within.
 Monster mermaid was using the treasure
 chest as a cradle.
 Pirates:
<p><a href="http://dragonsateyourtoast.tumblr.com/post/169373651900" class="tumblr_blog">dragonsateyourtoast</a>:</p><blockquote>
<p><a href="http://otherwindow.tumblr.com/post/169340235270/otherwindow-this-is-how-the-golden-age-of-piracy" class="tumblr_blog">otherwindow</a>:</p>
<blockquote>
<p><a href="http://otherwindow.tumblr.com/post/169291615220/this-is-how-the-golden-age-of-piracy-ended" class="tumblr_blog">otherwindow</a>:</p>
<blockquote><p>This is how the golden age of piracy ended.</p></blockquote>
<figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="677" data-orig-width="1000"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/51eb1c65a8936859a4b9e9ed54eb60d9/tumblr_inline_p22tdbtzyD1qdd180_540.jpg" data-orig-height="677" data-orig-width="1000"/></figure><p>The first mermaid to get tattoos :)</p>
</blockquote>

<p>“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”</p>
<p>“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.</p>
<p>“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”</p>
<p>“i know.”</p>
<p>x</p>
<p>“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”</p>
<p>her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.</p>
<p>“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.</p>
<p>“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.</p>
<p>x</p>
<p>“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”</p>
<p>“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”</p>
<p>she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.</p>
<p>x</p>
<p>“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.</p>
<p>“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”</p>
<p>she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.</p>
<p>“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”</p>
<p>x</p>
<p>her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”</p>
<p>the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.</p>
<p>“why not?” the mermaid asks.</p>
<p>“he’ll win,” the first mate says.</p>
<p>the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.</p>
<p>x</p>
<p>the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.</p>
<p>“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”</p>
<p>x</p>
<p>the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.</p>
<p>“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”</p>
<p>they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.</p>
<p>she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.</p>
<p>the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.</p>
<p>x</p>
<p>she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.</p>
<p>x</p>
<p>“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.</p>
<p>she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.</p>
<p>“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”</p>
<p>the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. </p>
<p>“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.</p>
<p>“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.</p>
<p>“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”</p>
<p>“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”</p>
<p>“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”</p>
<p>“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”</p>
<p>x</p>
<p>the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.</p>
<p>“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.</p>
<p>the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.</p>
<p>“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”</p>
<p>“and now?”</p>
<p>“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”</p>
<p>the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”</p>
</blockquote>

<p>Yooooo</p>
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Crying, Family, and Guns: Chwistopher
 @Loudwindow
 Concept: Pirates slay a monster mermaid
 to steal its treasure chest.
 Pirates open chest, finds a sleepy baby
 mermaid within.
 Monster mermaid was using the treasure
 chest as a cradle.
 Pirates:
<p><a href="http://dragonsateyourtoast.tumblr.com/post/169373651900" class="tumblr_blog">dragonsateyourtoast</a>:</p><blockquote>
<p><a href="http://otherwindow.tumblr.com/post/169340235270/otherwindow-this-is-how-the-golden-age-of-piracy" class="tumblr_blog">otherwindow</a>:</p>
<blockquote>
<p><a href="http://otherwindow.tumblr.com/post/169291615220/this-is-how-the-golden-age-of-piracy-ended" class="tumblr_blog">otherwindow</a>:</p>
<blockquote><p>This is how the golden age of piracy ended.</p></blockquote>
<figure class="tmblr-full" data-orig-height="677" data-orig-width="1000"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/51eb1c65a8936859a4b9e9ed54eb60d9/tumblr_inline_p22tdbtzyD1qdd180_540.jpg" data-orig-height="677" data-orig-width="1000"/></figure><p>The first mermaid to get tattoos :)</p>
</blockquote>

<p>“we didn’t know any better,” the crewman says, and swallows, presenting the chest to the captain. “what do we do now?”</p>
<p>“kill it,” the captain says, but the ice is melting in his eyes.</p>
<p>“we can’t,” the first mate says desperately, praying she won’t have to fight her captain on this. “we can’t. we - i won’t. we won’t.”</p>
<p>“i know.”</p>
<p>x</p>
<p>“daddy,” she says, floating in a tub of seawater in the hold, “daddy, la-la, la-la-la.”</p>
<p>her voice rings like bells. her accent is strange; her mouth isn’t made for human words. it mesmerises even the hardiest amongst them and she wasn’t even trying. the crew has taken to diving for shellfish near the shorelines for her; she loves them, splitting the shells apart with strength seen in no human toddler, slurping down the slimy molluscs inside and laughing, all plump brown cheeks and needle-sharp teeth. she sometimes splashes them for fun with her smooth, rubbery brown tail. even when they get soaked they laugh. they love her.</p>
<p>“daddy,” she calls again, and he can hear the worry in her voice. the storm rocking the ship is harsh and uncaring, and if they go down, she would be the only survivor.</p>
<p>“don’t worry,” he says, and goes over, sitting next to the tub. the first mate, leaning against the wall, pretends not to notice as he quietly begins to sing.</p>
<p>x</p>
<p>“father,” she says, one day, as she leans on the edge of the dock and the captain sits next to her, “why am I here?”</p>
<p>“your mother abandoned you,” he says, as he always has. “we found you adrift, and couldn’t bear to leave you there.”</p>
<p>she picks at the salt-soaked boards, uncertain. her hair is pulled back in a fluffy black puff, the white linen holding it slipping almost over one of her dark eyes. one of her first tattoos, a many-limbed kraken, curls over her right shoulder and down her arm, delicate tendrils wrapped around her calloused fingertips. “alright,” she says.</p>
<p>x</p>
<p>“why am I really here?” she asks the first mate, watching the sun set over the water in streaks of liquid metal that pooled in the troughs of the waves and glittered on the seafoam.</p>
<p>“we didn’t know any better,” the first mate says, staring into the water. “we didn’t know- we didn’t know anything. we didn’t understand why she fought so viciously to guard her treasure. we could not know she protected something a thousand times more precious than the purest gold.”</p>
<p>she wants to be furious, but she can’t. she already knew the answer, from reading the guilt in her father’s eyes and the empty space in her own history. and she can’t hate her family.</p>
<p>“it’s alright,” she says. “i do have a family, anyways. i don’t think i would have liked my other life near as much.”</p>
<p>x</p>
<p>her kraken grows, spreading its tendrils over her torso and arms. she grows too, too large to come on board the ship without being hauled up in a boat from the water. she sings when the storms come and swims before the ship to guide it to safety. she fights off more than one beast of the seas, and gathers a set of scars across her back that she bears with pride. “i don’t mind,” she says, when the captain fusses over her, “now i match all of you.”</p>
<p>the first time their ship is threatened, really threatened, is by another fleet. a friend turned enemy of the first mate. “we shouldn’t fight him,” she says, peering through the spyglass.</p>
<p>“why not?” the mermaid asks.</p>
<p>“he’ll win,” the first mate says.</p>
<p>the mermaid tips her head sideways. Her eyes, dark as the deep waters, gleam in the noon light. “are you sure?” she asks.</p>
<p>x</p>
<p>the enemy fleet surrenders after the flagship is sunk in the night, the anchor ripped off the ship and the planks torn off the hull. the surviving crew, wild-eyed and delirious, whimper and say a sea serpent came from the water and attacked them, say it was longer than the boat and crushed it in its coils. the first mate hears this and has to hide her laughter. the captain apologizes to his daughter for doubting her.</p>
<p>“don’t worry,” she says, with a bright laugh, “it was fun.”</p>
<p>x</p>
<p>the second time, they are pushed by a storm into a royal fleet. they can’t possibly fight them, and they don’t have the time to escape.</p>
<p>“let me up,” the mermaid urges, surfacing starboard and shouting to the crew. “bring me up, quickly, quickly.”</p>
<p>they lower the boat and she piles her sinous form into it, and uses her claws to help the crew pull her up. once on the deck she flops out of the boat and makes her way over to the bow. the crew tries to help but she’s so heavy they can barely lift parts of her.</p>
<p>she crawls up out in front of the rail and wraps her long webbed tail around the prow. the figurehead has served them well so far but they need more right now. she wraps herself around the figurehead and raises her body up into the wind takes a breath of the stinging salt air and sings.</p>
<p>the storm carries her voice on its front to the royal navy. they are enchanted, so stunned by her song that they drop the rigging ropes and let the tillers drift. the pirates sail through the center of the fleet, trailing the storm behind them, and by the time the fleet has managed to regain its senses they are buried in wind and rain and the pirates are gone.</p>
<p>x</p>
<p>she declines guns. instead she carries a harpoon and its launcher, and uses them to board enemy ships, hauling her massive form out of the water to coil on the deck and dispatch enemies with ruthless efficiency. her family is feared across all the sea.</p>
<p>x</p>
<p>“you know we are dying,” the captain says, looking down at her.</p>
<p>she floats next to the ship, so massive she could hold it in her arms. her eyes are wise.</p>
<p>“i know,” she says, “i can feel it coming.”</p>
<p>the first mate stands next to the captain. she never had a lover or a child, and neither did he, but to the mermaid they are her parents. she will always love her daughter. the tattoos are graven in dark swirls across the mermaid’s deep brown skin and the flesh of her tail, even spiraling onto the spiked webbing on her spine and face. her hair is still tied back, this time with a sail that could not be patched one last time. </p>
<p>“we love you,” the first mate says simply, looking down. her own tightly coiled black hair falls in to her face; she shakes the locs out of the way and smiles through her tears. the captain pretends he isnt crying either.</p>
<p>“i love you too,” the mermaid says, and reached up to pull the ship down just a bit, just to hold them one last time.</p>
<p>“guard the ship,” the captain says. “you always have but you know they’re lost without you.”</p>
<p>“without you,” the mermaid corrects, with a shrug that makes waves. “what will we do?”</p>
<p>“i don’t know,” the captain says. “but you’ll help them, won’t you?”</p>
<p>“of course i will,” she scoffs, rolling her eyes. “i will always protect my family.”</p>
<p>x</p>
<p>the captain and the first mate are gone. the ship has a new captain, young and fearless - of the things she can afford to disregard. she fears and loves the ocean, as all captains do. she does not fear the royal fleet. and she does not fear the mermaid.</p>
<p>“you know, i heard stories about you when i was a little girl,” she says, trailing her fingers in the water next to the dock.</p>
<p>the mermaid stares at her with one eye the size of a dinner table. “is that so?” she hums, smirking with teeth sharper than the swords of the entire navy.</p>
<p>“they said you could sink an entire fleet and that you had skin tougher than dragon scales,” the new captain says, grinning right back at the monster who could eat her without a moment’s hesitation. “i always thought they were telling tall tales.”</p>
<p>“and now?”</p>
<p>“they were right,” the new captain says. “how did they ever befriend you?”</p>
<p>the mermaid smiles, fully this time, her dark eyes gleaming under the white linen sail. “they didn’t know any better.”</p>
</blockquote>

<p>Yooooo</p>
                
            

            
            
<p><a href="http://dragonsateyourtoast.tumblr.com/post/169373651900" class="tumblr_blog">dragonsateyourtoast</a>:</p><blockquote>
<p><a href...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                




    Anime, Crying, and Dad: all 81%. 17:40
 be in high SC
 /r9k/42628703
 5 hours ago
 Anonymous
 42628703
 >be in high school, year 11
 at the beginning of the year
 i end up befriending a fellow
 called Max
 the more i get to know him
 the more i find out he is a
 massive fighting anime nerd
 and absolutely loves martial
 arts and has even gone so far
 as to teach himself Tijutsu
 from Naruto, however no one
 else seems to know other than
 his close friends
 also in thia class is a bully
 called Sykesey who is nigh on
 impervious to trouble because
 the school gives him an easy
 time because his dad left
 trouble starts when Max
 knocks a test tube out of
 Sykseys hand by accident
 after class Skysey confronts
 Max and gives him a punch
 to the stomach and claps his
 ears and tells Max to "know
 your place prick"
 Max then utters a phrase,
 through his tears that i will
 never forget
 >"So begins the 5th great ninja
 0
 wat.Png
 little did i know that Max was
 going to conduct a all out war
 against Syksey
 after the weekend has
 passed, Max comes into
 school and tells his friends
 to find Syksey because "this
 ends today
 >Legit think hes going to
 shoot the school up or
 something
 he goes to the bathroom and
 returns in a black Gi and he
 has the makeup of fucking
 Hashirama Seniu
 whatthefuck. Jpeg. Png
 confronts Syksey in the
 dinner room courtyard
 Max clasps his hands
 together and yells "WOOD
 STYLE, WILLIW LIMBS
 JUTSU!"
 >Syksey doesnt seem to give
 a shit and throws a punch at
 Max feints the punch and
 gives him three consecutive
 cracks to the side with his
 forearms
 >Syksey is pissed and goes
 ape mode
 Max keeps fucking dodging
 Syksey and lightly slaps him
 each time Syksey misses
 >Syksey is in a blind rage
 after a while Syksey is
 slowing down
 Max makes more handsigns
 and then yells "WOOD STYLE,
 OAK LIMBS JUSTU"
 begins pummling Skysey
 with his fists and palms
 beats him so severely that
 Sykey begins bleeding
 continues to beat him until
 Skysey passes out
 Thus the first battle was
 concluded
 7 REPLIES

 H+ 、11 81 %
 17:40
 >be in high sc
 rSk/42628703
 AC :
 Anonymous 4 hours ago
 42629676
 >>42629543
 Part Il- Tooth retrieval arc
 >so things were mostly quiet after the sound beating
 Max gave to Syksey, bar the odd n nasty look and
 push in the corridor (by Syksey), things were on the
 whole quiet
 this was until an unfortunate weekend where
 Syksey got blind drunk with his mates and someone
 brought up the fact that he got beat up by a "naruto
 kid"
 >Sykseys mates think this is hilarious and wind him
 up into a drunkern rage
 >Syksey sets off to find Max
 Actually finds the guy when hes walking home with
 me from a friends house
 Max never saw the thing coming until Syksey
 jumped on him and beat him with a tree branch
 knocked Max's two front teeth clean out
 Max being the tough cookie he is is laid prone on
 the floor with tears running down his face and blood
 everywhere
 >when Syksey is walking away Max screams the
 haunting words "IM NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS
 ANYMORE, DEATH REAPER SEAL JUTSU!" before
 passing out
 this time Max looses
 the war is far from lost though
 part 3 coming soon, really sorry lads, getting fucked
 with assignments

 Anonymous
 3 hours ago
 42630176
 Part lll- reaper death seal
 >So after the incident in
 42629676 Max has been
 real upset
 bumped his martial arts from
 2/3 sessions a weeek to every
 the guys is going at it HARD
 hes been real quiet at
 school too, the only coherent
 conversation that we can get
 from himk is that he wants to
 "Be strong enough to destroy
 Sykseys soul" and "i cast the
 death seal, i cant go back
 now"
 this guy takes his Naruto shit
 very seriously
 unexpectedly Syksey decides
 to return to his old bullying
 ways and trips Max in the
 corridor
 this is it, like a coiled spring
 Max begins weaving hands
 signs and growling
 legit think this kid is going to
 have a seizure
 "REAPER DEATH SEAL
 ohfuckthisisit.png.jpeg.exe.w
 inrar
 Max begind with a two
 armed claw grab at Sykseys
 upper arms
 Real pimncer grip going on
 because Syksey lets out a yelp
 from this position max yells
 WOOD STYLE OAKEN SKIN
 JUTSU"
 proceeds to swing his noggn
 forward and crack Skysey
 right on the uupper lip and
 nose
 like a jackhammer, Max
 pummles Skysey with his own
 Teacher tried to timidly get
 involves
 "LEAVE ME WOMAN I HAVE
 CAST THE SEAL
 >Syksey is trying to flail with
 his legs and catches Max on
 the knee and wriggles free
 from his grip
 bloody and scasred Syksey
 tried to run
 >Max stands stock still and
 gets into a crouching position
 "gate of Joy, OPEN"
 sprints at full tilt at the
 fleeing Skysey
 >spear tackles the fella to the
 ground
 >Max then consecutivly
 pummels the back of the guys
 head with his arms and fists
 until iother students pull the
 guy off of the bullt
 Max has entered beast mode
 thus concludes the
 penultimate saga
 5 REPLIES

 Anonymous 1 hour ago
 42632214
 The end of the 5th great ninja
 ar ptl
 as mentioned before, Syksey
 was given an easy time due to
 Over the course of year 11
 and lowwer sixth form, his fa-
 ther returned and brought with
 him Sykseys older brother, Jez
 mow Jez is mean, real
 fucking nasty piece of work
 and knew how to get under
 peoples skin
 at this time, Max had lost a
 good friend to a bus accident
 it, despite efforts by his other
 reall
 on himself and broiled his
 Now when Jez learned of this
 he egged Syksey on to nark
 on Max about it after learning
 what Max had done too.
 >Syksey begins his war of
 attrition against max, saying
 nasty shit about this friend
 begins sending letters to
 Mcax's house sig
 dead friend just to get under
 Max ay at
 to
 be exact, syksey goes all out
 with his bastardness and tells
 max that his friend probably
 killed himself to get away from
 >this hits max hard, real hard
 finding him later i
 bathrooms, hes been crying
 a lot but he has his Senju
 makeup on and its running
 fuckinghellthisissad.png
 through his tyears, Max
 utters 'Anon, i need to end this
 before i loose my ninja way
 >shit is Ma
 on Naruto?
 he then weaves many hand
 igns and says, t
 gritted teeth "Sage art wood
 release, True several thousand
 hands
 3 REPLIES
 Anonymous 41 minutes ago
 42632680
 The end of the great 5th ninja war pt II_Valley of the
 Friday passes when i witness the feel that was Max
 g through his Senju makeup
 cryn
 >he simply finds Syksey and challenges him outright
 max is visibly really torn up and Syksey agrees to a
 fight at a local recreation ground with a shit eating
 smug grin
 >Max leaves and begins to meditate in the
 max misses his final classes to meditate
 >find him after school with bloodshot eyes and
 redone makeup, this time he has continued his
 makeup down to his shoulders and collarbone
 >he has his black gGi on, but instead of being tied
 up, its hung across his shoulders with his sleeves
 dangling and his arms crossed on his chest
 thisshitisserious.config
 >Max seems to be in some sort of sage mode
 >Me and other friends decide to follow the guy
 >Makes his way to the rec ground where Skysey has
 brought two of his friends
 >Maxyoucantdothis>exe
 try to convince him out of it, theres three fuckers
 there, hes going to die
 si brought my mates with me ik think they want
 to fuck you up too, like your dead friend Max, dont
 worry youll see him soon
 >Max raises his hand and beckons them
 >Max's friend on his left lunges straight for Max
 >He dodges, and brings a knee up and an elbow
 across this kids throat
 Friend lets out a yelp and falls over
 In order to get their friend, both others rush
 Max,Max dodges every single fucking blow and
 responds by hammering them both with his
 orearms
 this goes on, the dodging and hammering until max
 Breaks one of Sykseys ribs
 Friend who fell over is back up by this time and
 tackles Max from behind
 except he doesnt, Max, in sage mode hadnt
 forgotten about the other friendd and swings his leg
 around and catches the guy square in the stomach
 the kid vomits and collpases
 >Syksey is in rage mode and lands a punch and a
 other friend twats Max across the ear and splits
 Maxs ear
 4 REPLIES
 26 minutes ago
 max with split ear provides a road of SAGE ART
 WOOD RELEASE, SEVERAL THOUSAND HANDS
 taking a small jump backwards, Max springs, full
 force into Skyseys other friend and floors the guy
 on top of him, Max relases a flurry of punches
 straight into the guys nose and face
 Max isnt stopping until, Skysey runs into Max
 this is it, the final fight
 >Skysey brings his body at full speed, trying to hit
 Max jumpes out of the way and brings his knee up
 into Sykseys
 >a sicken
 ing crunch
 ensues
 while prone on thwe floor Max mounts Syksey and
 begins hammerng his fists against Sykesys back
 an
 wailing and roaring through his tears, Max
 continues to pummel Syksey
 takes me and 4 of his friends to pull him off of
 sey
 while laid on the ground, Max utters '"I avenged you
 my friend, please rest in peace
 thus ended the 5th great shinobi war
 or
 3 REPLIES
Narutard goes sage mode
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Anime, Crying, and Dad: all 81%. 17:40
 be in high SC
 /r9k/42628703
 5 hours ago
 Anonymous
 42628703
 >be in high school, year 11
 at the beginning of the year
 i end up befriending a fellow
 called Max
 the more i get to know him
 the more i find out he is a
 massive fighting anime nerd
 and absolutely loves martial
 arts and has even gone so far
 as to teach himself Tijutsu
 from Naruto, however no one
 else seems to know other than
 his close friends
 also in thia class is a bully
 called Sykesey who is nigh on
 impervious to trouble because
 the school gives him an easy
 time because his dad left
 trouble starts when Max
 knocks a test tube out of
 Sykseys hand by accident
 after class Skysey confronts
 Max and gives him a punch
 to the stomach and claps his
 ears and tells Max to "know
 your place prick"
 Max then utters a phrase,
 through his tears that i will
 never forget
 >"So begins the 5th great ninja
 0
 wat.Png
 little did i know that Max was
 going to conduct a all out war
 against Syksey
 after the weekend has
 passed, Max comes into
 school and tells his friends
 to find Syksey because "this
 ends today
 >Legit think hes going to
 shoot the school up or
 something
 he goes to the bathroom and
 returns in a black Gi and he
 has the makeup of fucking
 Hashirama Seniu
 whatthefuck. Jpeg. Png
 confronts Syksey in the
 dinner room courtyard
 Max clasps his hands
 together and yells "WOOD
 STYLE, WILLIW LIMBS
 JUTSU!"
 >Syksey doesnt seem to give
 a shit and throws a punch at
 Max feints the punch and
 gives him three consecutive
 cracks to the side with his
 forearms
 >Syksey is pissed and goes
 ape mode
 Max keeps fucking dodging
 Syksey and lightly slaps him
 each time Syksey misses
 >Syksey is in a blind rage
 after a while Syksey is
 slowing down
 Max makes more handsigns
 and then yells "WOOD STYLE,
 OAK LIMBS JUSTU"
 begins pummling Skysey
 with his fists and palms
 beats him so severely that
 Sykey begins bleeding
 continues to beat him until
 Skysey passes out
 Thus the first battle was
 concluded
 7 REPLIES

 H+ 、11 81 %
 17:40
 >be in high sc
 rSk/42628703
 AC :
 Anonymous 4 hours ago
 42629676
 >>42629543
 Part Il- Tooth retrieval arc
 >so things were mostly quiet after the sound beating
 Max gave to Syksey, bar the odd n nasty look and
 push in the corridor (by Syksey), things were on the
 whole quiet
 this was until an unfortunate weekend where
 Syksey got blind drunk with his mates and someone
 brought up the fact that he got beat up by a "naruto
 kid"
 >Sykseys mates think this is hilarious and wind him
 up into a drunkern rage
 >Syksey sets off to find Max
 Actually finds the guy when hes walking home with
 me from a friends house
 Max never saw the thing coming until Syksey
 jumped on him and beat him with a tree branch
 knocked Max's two front teeth clean out
 Max being the tough cookie he is is laid prone on
 the floor with tears running down his face and blood
 everywhere
 >when Syksey is walking away Max screams the
 haunting words "IM NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS
 ANYMORE, DEATH REAPER SEAL JUTSU!" before
 passing out
 this time Max looses
 the war is far from lost though
 part 3 coming soon, really sorry lads, getting fucked
 with assignments

 Anonymous
 3 hours ago
 42630176
 Part lll- reaper death seal
 >So after the incident in
 42629676 Max has been
 real upset
 bumped his martial arts from
 2/3 sessions a weeek to every
 the guys is going at it HARD
 hes been real quiet at
 school too, the only coherent
 conversation that we can get
 from himk is that he wants to
 "Be strong enough to destroy
 Sykseys soul" and "i cast the
 death seal, i cant go back
 now"
 this guy takes his Naruto shit
 very seriously
 unexpectedly Syksey decides
 to return to his old bullying
 ways and trips Max in the
 corridor
 this is it, like a coiled spring
 Max begins weaving hands
 signs and growling
 legit think this kid is going to
 have a seizure
 "REAPER DEATH SEAL
 ohfuckthisisit.png.jpeg.exe.w
 inrar
 Max begind with a two
 armed claw grab at Sykseys
 upper arms
 Real pimncer grip going on
 because Syksey lets out a yelp
 from this position max yells
 WOOD STYLE OAKEN SKIN
 JUTSU"
 proceeds to swing his noggn
 forward and crack Skysey
 right on the uupper lip and
 nose
 like a jackhammer, Max
 pummles Skysey with his own
 Teacher tried to timidly get
 involves
 "LEAVE ME WOMAN I HAVE
 CAST THE SEAL
 >Syksey is trying to flail with
 his legs and catches Max on
 the knee and wriggles free
 from his grip
 bloody and scasred Syksey
 tried to run
 >Max stands stock still and
 gets into a crouching position
 "gate of Joy, OPEN"
 sprints at full tilt at the
 fleeing Skysey
 >spear tackles the fella to the
 ground
 >Max then consecutivly
 pummels the back of the guys
 head with his arms and fists
 until iother students pull the
 guy off of the bullt
 Max has entered beast mode
 thus concludes the
 penultimate saga
 5 REPLIES

 Anonymous 1 hour ago
 42632214
 The end of the 5th great ninja
 ar ptl
 as mentioned before, Syksey
 was given an easy time due to
 Over the course of year 11
 and lowwer sixth form, his fa-
 ther returned and brought with
 him Sykseys older brother, Jez
 mow Jez is mean, real
 fucking nasty piece of work
 and knew how to get under
 peoples skin
 at this time, Max had lost a
 good friend to a bus accident
 it, despite efforts by his other
 reall
 on himself and broiled his
 Now when Jez learned of this
 he egged Syksey on to nark
 on Max about it after learning
 what Max had done too.
 >Syksey begins his war of
 attrition against max, saying
 nasty shit about this friend
 begins sending letters to
 Mcax's house sig
 dead friend just to get under
 Max ay at
 to
 be exact, syksey goes all out
 with his bastardness and tells
 max that his friend probably
 killed himself to get away from
 >this hits max hard, real hard
 finding him later i
 bathrooms, hes been crying
 a lot but he has his Senju
 makeup on and its running
 fuckinghellthisissad.png
 through his tyears, Max
 utters 'Anon, i need to end this
 before i loose my ninja way
 >shit is Ma
 on Naruto?
 he then weaves many hand
 igns and says, t
 gritted teeth "Sage art wood
 release, True several thousand
 hands
 3 REPLIES
 Anonymous 41 minutes ago
 42632680
 The end of the great 5th ninja war pt II_Valley of the
 Friday passes when i witness the feel that was Max
 g through his Senju makeup
 cryn
 >he simply finds Syksey and challenges him outright
 max is visibly really torn up and Syksey agrees to a
 fight at a local recreation ground with a shit eating
 smug grin
 >Max leaves and begins to meditate in the
 max misses his final classes to meditate
 >find him after school with bloodshot eyes and
 redone makeup, this time he has continued his
 makeup down to his shoulders and collarbone
 >he has his black gGi on, but instead of being tied
 up, its hung across his shoulders with his sleeves
 dangling and his arms crossed on his chest
 thisshitisserious.config
 >Max seems to be in some sort of sage mode
 >Me and other friends decide to follow the guy
 >Makes his way to the rec ground where Skysey has
 brought two of his friends
 >Maxyoucantdothis>exe
 try to convince him out of it, theres three fuckers
 there, hes going to die
 si brought my mates with me ik think they want
 to fuck you up too, like your dead friend Max, dont
 worry youll see him soon
 >Max raises his hand and beckons them
 >Max's friend on his left lunges straight for Max
 >He dodges, and brings a knee up and an elbow
 across this kids throat
 Friend lets out a yelp and falls over
 In order to get their friend, both others rush
 Max,Max dodges every single fucking blow and
 responds by hammering them both with his
 orearms
 this goes on, the dodging and hammering until max
 Breaks one of Sykseys ribs
 Friend who fell over is back up by this time and
 tackles Max from behind
 except he doesnt, Max, in sage mode hadnt
 forgotten about the other friendd and swings his leg
 around and catches the guy square in the stomach
 the kid vomits and collpases
 >Syksey is in rage mode and lands a punch and a
 other friend twats Max across the ear and splits
 Maxs ear
 4 REPLIES
 26 minutes ago
 max with split ear provides a road of SAGE ART
 WOOD RELEASE, SEVERAL THOUSAND HANDS
 taking a small jump backwards, Max springs, full
 force into Skyseys other friend and floors the guy
 on top of him, Max relases a flurry of punches
 straight into the guys nose and face
 Max isnt stopping until, Skysey runs into Max
 this is it, the final fight
 >Skysey brings his body at full speed, trying to hit
 Max jumpes out of the way and brings his knee up
 into Sykseys
 >a sicken
 ing crunch
 ensues
 while prone on thwe floor Max mounts Syksey and
 begins hammerng his fists against Sykesys back
 an
 wailing and roaring through his tears, Max
 continues to pummel Syksey
 takes me and 4 of his friends to pull him off of
 sey
 while laid on the ground, Max utters '"I avenged you
 my friend, please rest in peace
 thus ended the 5th great shinobi war
 or
 3 REPLIES
Narutard goes sage mode
                
            

            
            
Narutard goes sage mode

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                




    Bored, Dude, and Instagram: <p><a href="https://youcantseebutimmakingaface.tumblr.com/post/169630220743/archiemcphee-the-patient-this-3-day-old" class="tumblr_blog">youcantseebutimmakingaface</a>:</p>
<blockquote>
<p><a href="http://geyserofawesome.com/post/169625585097/the-patient-this-3-day-old-little-boy-was-born" class="tumblr_blog">archiemcphee</a>:</p>

<blockquote>
<blockquote><p>“The patient: this 3-day-old little boy was born with torn upper and lower wings. Let’s see how we can help!”<br/></p></blockquote>
<p>Today the <a href="http://geyserofawesome.com/tagged/good%20deeds">Department of Awesomely Good Deeds</a> salutes costume designer and master embroiderer <a href="https://www.instagram.com/fadendesignstudios/">Romy McCloskey</a> who used her fine skills with delicate materials to help a monarch butterfly she’d raised and who’d emerged from his cocoon with damaged right wings.</p>
<blockquote><p>“The operating room and supplies: towel, wire hanger, contact cement, toothpick, cotton swab, scissors, tweezers, talc powder, extra butterfly wing”</p></blockquote>
<figure data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="525" class="tmblr-full"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/ddd8ab42fb0cbd29595e6ba81647205a/tumblr_inline_p2fcklqjyN1qzf6t4_540.jpg" alt="image" data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="525"/></figure><blockquote><p>“Securing the butterfly and cutting the damaged parts away. Don’t worry it doesn’t hurt them. It’s like cutting hair or trimming fingernails”<br/></p></blockquote>
<figure data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="933" class="tmblr-full"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/37a3dcb24fffecc53e85e63601854dd8/tumblr_inline_p2fckzjnx71qzf6t4_540.jpg" alt="image" data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="933"/></figure><blockquote><p>“Ta-da! With a little patience and a steady hand, I fit the new wings to my little guy”<br/></p></blockquote>
<figure data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="933" class="tmblr-full"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/61a62d2bf38dc5a388af4ff9639d277e/tumblr_inline_p2fcl8q5n21qzf6t4_540.jpg" alt="image" data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="933"/></figure><blockquote><p>“The black lines do not match completely and it is missing the black dot (male marking) on the lower right wing, but with luck, he will fly”<br/></p></blockquote>
<figure data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="933" class="tmblr-full"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/04440c19c5a1a66742638e51328f46f0/tumblr_inline_p2fcmesA921qzf6t4_540.jpg" alt="image" data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="933"/></figure><figure data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="747" class="tmblr-full"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/d7fb4b2374d72512ccb6bd66f9a5877f/tumblr_inline_p2fck1icpc1qzf6t4_540.jpg" alt="image" data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="747"/></figure><blockquote>
<p>“FLIGHT DAY! After a day of rest and filling his belly with homemade nectar, it is time to see if he will fly”<br/></p>
<p>“With a quick lap around the yard and a little rest on a bush, he was off! A successful surgery and outcome! Bye, little buddy! Good luck”<br/></p>
</blockquote>
<figure data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="933" class="tmblr-full"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/522e928c4ebdeee225f16eeea66ff837/tumblr_inline_p2fchqCt6n1qzf6t4_540.jpg" alt="image" data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="933"/></figure><p>[via <a href="https://www.boredpanda.com/monarch-butterfly-wing-transplantation/">Bored Panda</a>]</p>
</blockquote>

<p>Imagine being the biologist who finds this little dude in the wild and realizes someone loved him enough to do a full on wing transplant</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Y se la comió un pájaro.</p>
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Bored, Dude, and Instagram: <p><a href="https://youcantseebutimmakingaface.tumblr.com/post/169630220743/archiemcphee-the-patient-this-3-day-old" class="tumblr_blog">youcantseebutimmakingaface</a>:</p>
<blockquote>
<p><a href="http://geyserofawesome.com/post/169625585097/the-patient-this-3-day-old-little-boy-was-born" class="tumblr_blog">archiemcphee</a>:</p>

<blockquote>
<blockquote><p>“The patient: this 3-day-old little boy was born with torn upper and lower wings. Let’s see how we can help!”<br/></p></blockquote>
<p>Today the <a href="http://geyserofawesome.com/tagged/good%20deeds">Department of Awesomely Good Deeds</a> salutes costume designer and master embroiderer <a href="https://www.instagram.com/fadendesignstudios/">Romy McCloskey</a> who used her fine skills with delicate materials to help a monarch butterfly she’d raised and who’d emerged from his cocoon with damaged right wings.</p>
<blockquote><p>“The operating room and supplies: towel, wire hanger, contact cement, toothpick, cotton swab, scissors, tweezers, talc powder, extra butterfly wing”</p></blockquote>
<figure data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="525" class="tmblr-full"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/ddd8ab42fb0cbd29595e6ba81647205a/tumblr_inline_p2fcklqjyN1qzf6t4_540.jpg" alt="image" data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="525"/></figure><blockquote><p>“Securing the butterfly and cutting the damaged parts away. Don’t worry it doesn’t hurt them. It’s like cutting hair or trimming fingernails”<br/></p></blockquote>
<figure data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="933" class="tmblr-full"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/37a3dcb24fffecc53e85e63601854dd8/tumblr_inline_p2fckzjnx71qzf6t4_540.jpg" alt="image" data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="933"/></figure><blockquote><p>“Ta-da! With a little patience and a steady hand, I fit the new wings to my little guy”<br/></p></blockquote>
<figure data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="933" class="tmblr-full"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/61a62d2bf38dc5a388af4ff9639d277e/tumblr_inline_p2fcl8q5n21qzf6t4_540.jpg" alt="image" data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="933"/></figure><blockquote><p>“The black lines do not match completely and it is missing the black dot (male marking) on the lower right wing, but with luck, he will fly”<br/></p></blockquote>
<figure data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="933" class="tmblr-full"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/04440c19c5a1a66742638e51328f46f0/tumblr_inline_p2fcmesA921qzf6t4_540.jpg" alt="image" data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="933"/></figure><figure data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="747" class="tmblr-full"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/d7fb4b2374d72512ccb6bd66f9a5877f/tumblr_inline_p2fck1icpc1qzf6t4_540.jpg" alt="image" data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="747"/></figure><blockquote>
<p>“FLIGHT DAY! After a day of rest and filling his belly with homemade nectar, it is time to see if he will fly”<br/></p>
<p>“With a quick lap around the yard and a little rest on a bush, he was off! A successful surgery and outcome! Bye, little buddy! Good luck”<br/></p>
</blockquote>
<figure data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="933" class="tmblr-full"><img src="https://78.media.tumblr.com/522e928c4ebdeee225f16eeea66ff837/tumblr_inline_p2fchqCt6n1qzf6t4_540.jpg" alt="image" data-orig-width="700" data-orig-height="933"/></figure><p>[via <a href="https://www.boredpanda.com/monarch-butterfly-wing-transplantation/">Bored Panda</a>]</p>
</blockquote>

<p>Imagine being the biologist who finds this little dude in the wild and realizes someone loved him enough to do a full on wing transplant</p>
</blockquote>
<p>Y se la comió un pájaro.</p>
                
            

            
            
<p><a href="https://youcantseebutimmakingaface.tumblr.com/post/169630220743/archiemcphee-the-patient-this-3-day-old" class="tumblr_blog">you...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                




    Advice, Baller Alert, and Boo: Baller Mail: "l've Fallen In Love With
 My Side Boo, But l Don't Want To
 Leave My Boyfriend of 22 Years"
 13
 @balleralert
Baller Mail: “I’ve Fallen In Love With My Side Boo, But I Don’t Want To Leave My Boyfriend of 22 Years” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ If you’re going through a tough time-whether its with your relationship, your career, or just life, Baller Alert is here to give you some advice. While it can be hard to talk to family and friends out of fear of being juddged, we are here to be that listening ear. If you want to remain anonymous or don’t mind putting your business on front street, our followers will always give you the real deal and tell you what you need to know. If you would like some ballerific advice from our followers, DM your questions to @peachkyss or email at Peachkyss@balleralert.com. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Baller Mail...Message! ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “I’ve been in a relationship since high school. 22 years later we have 3 kids and still live with his mother. We have not been sexually active for over 2 years. I️ started cheating a year ago and I’m happy again for a change but I️m hesitant on leaving my HS sweetheart we have so much history and he really loves me and the kids. He recently started acting like he wants to do better and work on the relationship but part of me feels like it’s too late and if I️ stay it would be for the Kids, however I️ do love him I’m not in love with him but I️ think we can fall back in love with one another but I’m falling in loving with my side boo! I’m so torn I️ really don’t want to stop seeing him but I️ don’t want to break up my family...what should I do?” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ What advice would you give our reader?
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Advice, Baller Alert, and Boo: Baller Mail: "l've Fallen In Love With
 My Side Boo, But l Don't Want To
 Leave My Boyfriend of 22 Years"
 13
 @balleralert
Baller Mail: “I’ve Fallen In Love With My Side Boo, But I Don’t Want To Leave My Boyfriend of 22 Years” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ If you’re going through a tough time-whether its with your relationship, your career, or just life, Baller Alert is here to give you some advice. While it can be hard to talk to family and friends out of fear of being juddged, we are here to be that listening ear. If you want to remain anonymous or don’t mind putting your business on front street, our followers will always give you the real deal and tell you what you need to know. If you would like some ballerific advice from our followers, DM your questions to @peachkyss or email at Peachkyss@balleralert.com. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Baller Mail...Message! ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ “I’ve been in a relationship since high school. 22 years later we have 3 kids and still live with his mother. We have not been sexually active for over 2 years. I️ started cheating a year ago and I’m happy again for a change but I️m hesitant on leaving my HS sweetheart we have so much history and he really loves me and the kids. He recently started acting like he wants to do better and work on the relationship but part of me feels like it’s too late and if I️ stay it would be for the Kids, however I️ do love him I’m not in love with him but I️ think we can fall back in love with one another but I’m falling in loving with my side boo! I’m so torn I️ really don’t want to stop seeing him but I️ don’t want to break up my family...what should I do?” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ What advice would you give our reader?
                
            

            
            
Baller Mail: “I’ve Fallen In Love With My Side Boo, But I Don’t Want To Leave My Boyfriend of 22 Years” ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ If you’re going thro...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                



            

        

        
        

            

                




    Ass, Bad, and Bitch: I seen this on fb & died laughing
 I wanna suck ya dick trom the
 back and start sucking it dumb
 crazy licking ya balls with the
 tip of my tongue and put ya
 whole dick in my mouth and let
 u fuck my throat then I'm
 gunna with and suck the heac
 of ya dick dumb nasty til u bust
 on my bottom lip then I want
 nibble on the head of ya dick,
 then I wana spit on ya meat
 making ya shit wet...i wana
 suck on ya balls and slurp on
 the head of ya dick making ya
 toes curl., .then ima massage
 on ya balls
 Who this
 Sorry wrong number
 Na this the right number
I remember when my mom didn’t buy me a side kick because my grades was ass. I wasn’t a bad student my teacher just be lying when it came to parent teachers conference. The bitch would say I talked to much or was trying to be the class clown and it was disrespect. First of all none of us wanted to even be there and second of all she was about 80 years old she couldn’t even hold a piece of chalk to write on the board. Hand writing looking like a ekg. I wasn’t with the shits. Long story short I saved up some money and bought a sidekick. I had to get the monthly sim card minutes form the Arabs at the corner store. Everyhood got some Arab niggas tryna EXTORT the black community. My boy put me on to this NYC GROUP chat where you would send your age, sex and location. It was the perfect way to fiNNESSE the fuck outta hoes and get your meat tickled. It was late one school night and I was Talking to this one girl on AIM. She told me she lived near me and she was about 19 years old. Boy I was 12 and my dick was stiffer than a corpse. I hit her up smoothly tryna see what she was about. I thought I was freak so I tell her that I wanted to suck in her titles while playing my GameCube. My mom busy in my room cause she heard the door slamming animation form aim. Black mommas hate when you slam the door in they crib. She saw my sidekick light up and took it. I had to fitness and say my friend left it in my bag from school and I was gonna return it. Momma wasn’t buying that shit and took it.I’m going to bed salty as fuck. ( I ain’t know how to beat my meat yet so I was stuck horny). My mom bust in my room 2 minutes later furious, she ain’t know the foolishness I was partaking in. I will never for get what “MizzFabulous71890” sent me back “boy I want you to choke me with your GameCube controller cables and beat my ass cheeks like Kimbl slice. I wanna gargle your nut like listerine and swish it in my mouth like wine. I want to bounce on your dick to the point your balls burst and have you sore the next morning”. Bitch I got PE class tomorrow that’s gonna be painful as fuck. My momma ain’t know I was a freak a leak. I got my ass torn up
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Ass, Bad, and Bitch: I seen this on fb & died laughing
 I wanna suck ya dick trom the
 back and start sucking it dumb
 crazy licking ya balls with the
 tip of my tongue and put ya
 whole dick in my mouth and let
 u fuck my throat then I'm
 gunna with and suck the heac
 of ya dick dumb nasty til u bust
 on my bottom lip then I want
 nibble on the head of ya dick,
 then I wana spit on ya meat
 making ya shit wet...i wana
 suck on ya balls and slurp on
 the head of ya dick making ya
 toes curl., .then ima massage
 on ya balls
 Who this
 Sorry wrong number
 Na this the right number
I remember when my mom didn’t buy me a side kick because my grades was ass. I wasn’t a bad student my teacher just be lying when it came to parent teachers conference. The bitch would say I talked to much or was trying to be the class clown and it was disrespect. First of all none of us wanted to even be there and second of all she was about 80 years old she couldn’t even hold a piece of chalk to write on the board. Hand writing looking like a ekg. I wasn’t with the shits. Long story short I saved up some money and bought a sidekick. I had to get the monthly sim card minutes form the Arabs at the corner store. Everyhood got some Arab niggas tryna EXTORT the black community. My boy put me on to this NYC GROUP chat where you would send your age, sex and location. It was the perfect way to fiNNESSE the fuck outta hoes and get your meat tickled. It was late one school night and I was Talking to this one girl on AIM. She told me she lived near me and she was about 19 years old. Boy I was 12 and my dick was stiffer than a corpse. I hit her up smoothly tryna see what she was about. I thought I was freak so I tell her that I wanted to suck in her titles while playing my GameCube. My mom busy in my room cause she heard the door slamming animation form aim. Black mommas hate when you slam the door in they crib. She saw my sidekick light up and took it. I had to fitness and say my friend left it in my bag from school and I was gonna return it. Momma wasn’t buying that shit and took it.I’m going to bed salty as fuck. ( I ain’t know how to beat my meat yet so I was stuck horny). My mom bust in my room 2 minutes later furious, she ain’t know the foolishness I was partaking in. I will never for get what “MizzFabulous71890” sent me back “boy I want you to choke me with your GameCube controller cables and beat my ass cheeks like Kimbl slice. I wanna gargle your nut like listerine and swish it in my mouth like wine. I want to bounce on your dick to the point your balls burst and have you sore the next morning”. Bitch I got PE class tomorrow that’s gonna be painful as fuck. My momma ain’t know I was a freak a leak. I got my ass torn up
                
            

            
            
I remember when my mom didn’t buy me a side kick because my grades was ass. I wasn’t a bad student my teacher just be lying when it came to ...