Smells Like


                    
                    
                

                

                

            

        
    







            

            
            

                

                    
                

                

                    

                        


	

	
    
        

            

                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        You Smell
        

            
            You Smell
        

    

    

         
You Smell

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        Glitterator
        

            
            Glitterator
        

    

    

         
Glitterator

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        Whoever Smelt It Dealt It
        

            
            Whoever Smelt It Dealt It
        

    

    

         
Whoever Smelt It Dealt It

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        Smelt It Dealt It
        

            
            Smelt It Dealt It
        

    

    

         
Smelt It Dealt It

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        Farted
        

            
            Farted
        

    

    

         
Farted

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

        come-home
        

            
            come-home
        

    

    

         
come-home

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

         smelling
        

            
             smelling
        

    

    

         
 smelling

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

         love me
        

            
             love me
        

    

    

         
 love me

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

         farting
        

            
             farting
        

    

    

         
 farting

    



                
                    
                    
                    
                    

    

         cologne
        

            
             cologne
        

    

    

         
 cologne

    



                
            

        

    
    

        🔥 | Latest
    

    
    

        

        
        

            

                







    Smells Like: it smells like victory
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Smells Like: it smells like victory
                
            

            
            
it smells like victory

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    Smells Like: Smells like home.
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Smells Like: Smells like home.
                
            

            
            
Smells like home.

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    Smells Like: smells like bean spirit
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Smells Like: smells like bean spirit
                
            

            
            
smells like bean spirit

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    Smells Like: lemonsgivelife:
debthestoner:

rrdcooc:

addakax:

mysticalalleycat:

politicalcdnmama:

theresagooseinthemainframe:

0-memento-mori-0:

justaplate:

claydart:

starlitskyes:

frosttrix:

extremedistressorstellarblowjob:

queen-of-heck:


brightoncemore:

todayiwrotenothing:

gay-jesus-probably:

solongstarbird:

akamine-chan:

phantomofthebookstore:

dragonastra:

jasperzilla:

moose-shampoo:
if you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to live in the midwest, this is it. 

You missed some of the best ones 

the best part about it is that the art installation isn’t actually called the Bean. It’s called Cloud Gate, and artist Anish Kapoor (yes, THAT Anish Kapoor) hates that we call it the Bean.
But i mean, look at it. It’s a bean.


How could you forget this one though


I HAD NO FUCKING IDEA THAT THE BEAN WAS CREATED BY ANISH KAPOOR.

someone help me why is anish kapoor important what did he do?

Alright sit down for some Art World Drama bcause this is what I live for.
So, sometime last year (?) science invented Vantablack, which is the darkest possible shade of black. Art world got incredibly excited. But as it needs to be very carefully made in a lab, it’s hard to get a hold of, and is extremely expensive. Enter Anish Kapoor, aka FuckFace McGee. Anish Kapoor buys the rights to Vantablack. He is the only human being on the planet that can legally use it, and he’s kind of a prick about it.
Art world is not thrilled with that.
Enter Stuart Semple.
Stuart Semple is an artist, and also makes pigments to sell in his free time. Stuart Semple is astoundingly pissed about this Vantablack nonsense, and Anish Kapoor’s dickery. Stuart Semple makes a new pigment, the brightest shade of pink ever, called Pinkest Pink, and puts it for sale on the internet. To be bought by everybody except Anish Kapoor. Literally, to purchase, you need to confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, do not associate with him, and will not sell or give the pigment to Anish Kapoor or his associates. Art world has a good laugh, everyone buys Pinkest Pink because it’s awesome, and damn it we deserve something.
Anish Kapoor however is a penis, and will not take this lying down, because HOW DARE he not have literally everything.
Anish Kapoor gets his London associates to buy him a thing of Pinkest Pink, and being such a classy human being, posts a picture to instagram of him with his middle finger covered in Pinkest Pink, captioned with “Up yours. #pink”
Everyone flips shit, because. Y’know. Fuck that guy. Especially Stuart Semple. For context here, Anish Kapoor is one of the richest artists on the planet, and has repeatedly been referred to as everything wrong with the art world, and the epitome of the art worlds elitism problem. He’s a giant douchebag. Meanwhile Stuart Semple makes pigments just to get them out there. He turns 0 profit from his now enourmously popular pigments.
Stuart Semple launches an investigation as to who the fuck leaked Pinkest Pink, and plans to strike back. He does so by releasing two new products. First is Diamond Dust, which is a glitter made from glass, so that a painting is still visible after it’s applied, but glitters like a mofo. It’s the most reflective glitter out there, and is available to everyone who isn’t Anish Kapoor. And it being made of glass, if you stick your finger in there, it’s going to hurt quite a bit, so that was Stuart Semple’s way of saying “shove your middle finger in this, asshole, see what happens”. Except without saying that, because he can get an insult across while still being fucking classy.
He also releases Black 2.0, created with the help of over a thousand artists worldwide.
Black 2.0 is the answer to Vantablack. Black 2.0 is a slightly less black black, but looks functionally the same to the human eye. It’s completely safe, smells like cherries, and costs four pounds. Vantablack is highly toxic, potentially explosive, needs to be applied in a special laboratory and sealed properly, can’t be moved across borders, can reach 300 degrees celsius if you’re not extremely careful, and costs thousands of dollars. Anish Kapoor is the only human being who can use Vantablack. He is the only human being who cannot use Black 2.0.
So I think we can guess who got the better deal.
And thus the feud ends, Kapoor defeated.
…But not quite.
Kapoor, in this entire afair, has made exactly two comments to the public. The first being his charming message about aquiring Pinkest Pink, the second being claiming to Buzzfeed that he and his small army of lawyers will be suing Semple, an extremely poor artist who cannot afford a lawyer.
No lawsuit has been made yet, fyi.
The point is, Kapoor is a prick, and doesn’t like talking to the lower classes. So one day in July 2017, he decides he needs another floor on his London studio apartment, and starts making arrangements to have it built. His neighbors are fucking pissed, because this will ruin the light of their apartments. They call to Semple to save them, or at the very least piss Kapoor off some more.
Semple answers to the call, and releases two new paints, Phaze and Shift, as always, banned to Kapoor. They change colours, Phaze with temperature, and Shift is just iridescent. Shift needs to be painted over Black 2.0 to work, and Phaze just works on its own.
So that’s been the art world for the last two years.
Basically, get fucked Anish Kapoor your bean sucks and so does your vantablack.

Stuart Semple is organising a bean-kissing event for Anish Kapoor’s birthday.


Reblogging for “By attending this event you confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, you are in no way affiliated with Anish Kapoor, you are not attending on behalf of Anish Kapoor or an associate of Anish Kapoor. To the best of your knowledge, information, and belief this event will not be attended by Anish Kapoor.”


ALSO HE JUST POSTED THIS!!!!!! LIGHTEST LIGHT!


I know this isn’t my art blog but this entire post gives me life 

im sorry is that man holding a real actual miniature star in his hands

Y’all missed the best part about the lightest light, called aptly ‘Lit’. This is from their product page:

Two things:
1. “Anish Kapoor is however a penis” is the best line in this post.
2. I wish to be half as petty and half as awesome as Stuart Semple


I hope Stuart Semple is making a lot of money. What a good person.

Go support him the paint’s are pretty cheap and you get the added bonus of being one of many to help piss off Anish Kapoor


He is my fucking role model for pettiness oh my god 


It got better! I’m also excited because he just released biodegradable glitter in non plastic containers! How amazing is that?! Stuart Semple, good guy for the planet and artists, fighter against the rich elite artist like asshole Kapoor.


An older project, but he also did this:
(x)

oh dude hes metal as fuck 

Every addition to this post is better than the last.


Me, being gay and having my blood drawn: so…what do you need my blood for again?
Stuart Semple: gonna make an anti-government t-shirt with it.
Me:
Me: :)



Be a Stuart Semple in 2020. Use your petty to inspire and drive you.

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Smells Like: lemonsgivelife:
debthestoner:

rrdcooc:

addakax:

mysticalalleycat:

politicalcdnmama:

theresagooseinthemainframe:

0-memento-mori-0:

justaplate:

claydart:

starlitskyes:

frosttrix:

extremedistressorstellarblowjob:

queen-of-heck:


brightoncemore:

todayiwrotenothing:

gay-jesus-probably:

solongstarbird:

akamine-chan:

phantomofthebookstore:

dragonastra:

jasperzilla:

moose-shampoo:
if you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to live in the midwest, this is it. 

You missed some of the best ones 

the best part about it is that the art installation isn’t actually called the Bean. It’s called Cloud Gate, and artist Anish Kapoor (yes, THAT Anish Kapoor) hates that we call it the Bean.
But i mean, look at it. It’s a bean.


How could you forget this one though


I HAD NO FUCKING IDEA THAT THE BEAN WAS CREATED BY ANISH KAPOOR.

someone help me why is anish kapoor important what did he do?

Alright sit down for some Art World Drama bcause this is what I live for.
So, sometime last year (?) science invented Vantablack, which is the darkest possible shade of black. Art world got incredibly excited. But as it needs to be very carefully made in a lab, it’s hard to get a hold of, and is extremely expensive. Enter Anish Kapoor, aka FuckFace McGee. Anish Kapoor buys the rights to Vantablack. He is the only human being on the planet that can legally use it, and he’s kind of a prick about it.
Art world is not thrilled with that.
Enter Stuart Semple.
Stuart Semple is an artist, and also makes pigments to sell in his free time. Stuart Semple is astoundingly pissed about this Vantablack nonsense, and Anish Kapoor’s dickery. Stuart Semple makes a new pigment, the brightest shade of pink ever, called Pinkest Pink, and puts it for sale on the internet. To be bought by everybody except Anish Kapoor. Literally, to purchase, you need to confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, do not associate with him, and will not sell or give the pigment to Anish Kapoor or his associates. Art world has a good laugh, everyone buys Pinkest Pink because it’s awesome, and damn it we deserve something.
Anish Kapoor however is a penis, and will not take this lying down, because HOW DARE he not have literally everything.
Anish Kapoor gets his London associates to buy him a thing of Pinkest Pink, and being such a classy human being, posts a picture to instagram of him with his middle finger covered in Pinkest Pink, captioned with “Up yours. #pink”
Everyone flips shit, because. Y’know. Fuck that guy. Especially Stuart Semple. For context here, Anish Kapoor is one of the richest artists on the planet, and has repeatedly been referred to as everything wrong with the art world, and the epitome of the art worlds elitism problem. He’s a giant douchebag. Meanwhile Stuart Semple makes pigments just to get them out there. He turns 0 profit from his now enourmously popular pigments.
Stuart Semple launches an investigation as to who the fuck leaked Pinkest Pink, and plans to strike back. He does so by releasing two new products. First is Diamond Dust, which is a glitter made from glass, so that a painting is still visible after it’s applied, but glitters like a mofo. It’s the most reflective glitter out there, and is available to everyone who isn’t Anish Kapoor. And it being made of glass, if you stick your finger in there, it’s going to hurt quite a bit, so that was Stuart Semple’s way of saying “shove your middle finger in this, asshole, see what happens”. Except without saying that, because he can get an insult across while still being fucking classy.
He also releases Black 2.0, created with the help of over a thousand artists worldwide.
Black 2.0 is the answer to Vantablack. Black 2.0 is a slightly less black black, but looks functionally the same to the human eye. It’s completely safe, smells like cherries, and costs four pounds. Vantablack is highly toxic, potentially explosive, needs to be applied in a special laboratory and sealed properly, can’t be moved across borders, can reach 300 degrees celsius if you’re not extremely careful, and costs thousands of dollars. Anish Kapoor is the only human being who can use Vantablack. He is the only human being who cannot use Black 2.0.
So I think we can guess who got the better deal.
And thus the feud ends, Kapoor defeated.
…But not quite.
Kapoor, in this entire afair, has made exactly two comments to the public. The first being his charming message about aquiring Pinkest Pink, the second being claiming to Buzzfeed that he and his small army of lawyers will be suing Semple, an extremely poor artist who cannot afford a lawyer.
No lawsuit has been made yet, fyi.
The point is, Kapoor is a prick, and doesn’t like talking to the lower classes. So one day in July 2017, he decides he needs another floor on his London studio apartment, and starts making arrangements to have it built. His neighbors are fucking pissed, because this will ruin the light of their apartments. They call to Semple to save them, or at the very least piss Kapoor off some more.
Semple answers to the call, and releases two new paints, Phaze and Shift, as always, banned to Kapoor. They change colours, Phaze with temperature, and Shift is just iridescent. Shift needs to be painted over Black 2.0 to work, and Phaze just works on its own.
So that’s been the art world for the last two years.
Basically, get fucked Anish Kapoor your bean sucks and so does your vantablack.

Stuart Semple is organising a bean-kissing event for Anish Kapoor’s birthday.


Reblogging for “By attending this event you confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, you are in no way affiliated with Anish Kapoor, you are not attending on behalf of Anish Kapoor or an associate of Anish Kapoor. To the best of your knowledge, information, and belief this event will not be attended by Anish Kapoor.”


ALSO HE JUST POSTED THIS!!!!!! LIGHTEST LIGHT!


I know this isn’t my art blog but this entire post gives me life 

im sorry is that man holding a real actual miniature star in his hands

Y’all missed the best part about the lightest light, called aptly ‘Lit’. This is from their product page:

Two things:
1. “Anish Kapoor is however a penis” is the best line in this post.
2. I wish to be half as petty and half as awesome as Stuart Semple


I hope Stuart Semple is making a lot of money. What a good person.

Go support him the paint’s are pretty cheap and you get the added bonus of being one of many to help piss off Anish Kapoor


He is my fucking role model for pettiness oh my god 


It got better! I’m also excited because he just released biodegradable glitter in non plastic containers! How amazing is that?! Stuart Semple, good guy for the planet and artists, fighter against the rich elite artist like asshole Kapoor.


An older project, but he also did this:
(x)

oh dude hes metal as fuck 

Every addition to this post is better than the last.


Me, being gay and having my blood drawn: so…what do you need my blood for again?
Stuart Semple: gonna make an anti-government t-shirt with it.
Me:
Me: :)



Be a Stuart Semple in 2020. Use your petty to inspire and drive you.

                
            

            
            
lemonsgivelife:
debthestoner:

rrdcooc:

addakax:

mysticalalleycat:

politicalcdnmama:

theresagooseinthemainframe:

0-memento-mori-0:...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                







    Smells Like: vialsofbrightforgettingpowders
 ALRIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS, TIME FOR SOME LEARNIN
 SO SIT OUR BITCH ASS DOWN AND GET OUT OUR
 NOTEPAD
 THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE IS SUGAR SCRUB. YEAH I KNOW
 YOUVE SEEN IT BEFORE BUT YOU DONT KNOW WHAT I
 KNOW AND THAT WHEN YOU USE IT WITH ONE OF THESE
 FUCKERS
 YOU WILL GET LEGS AND ARMS AND ANY OTHER SHIT
 YOU WANT THAT IS SO SOFT YOU WILL BE SHOVING IT IN
 THE FACE OF EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND ASKING THEM
 TO COMPARE IT TO THE TENDER PINK FLESH OF A
 NEWBORN
 sO GET YOURSELF SOME FUCKING WHITE SUGAR AND
 SOME CHEAP ASS OIL LIKE CANOLA OR SOME SHIT AND
 MIX THAT SHIT WITH TWO PARTS SUGAR AND ONE PART
 OIL( THAT MEANS TWICE AS MUCH SUGAR AS OIL
 BITCHES I USUALLY USE ONE CUP OF SUGAR AND DO
 SOME FUCKING MATH TO FIGURE OUT HOW MUCH OIL
 THAT IS) DROP A FEW DROPS OF VANILLA ESSENCE OR
 MAYBE SOME FUCKING LAVENDER OIL WHATEVER YOU
 WANNA SMELL LIKE. MIX IT UP REALLY GOOD MMMM
 SMELLS LIKE CAKE BATTER FUCK YEAH.
 NOW GET YOURSELF GOOD AND NAKED. REAL NAKED
 PAMPER YOUR GODDESS-LIKE ASS WITHA BUBBLE
 BATH. TAKE ONE OF THOSE RAZORS YOU GOT AND
 SHAVE WHATEVER YOU LIKE TO SHAVE LEGS ARMS
 VAJAYJAY PITS I DONT FUCKING CARE
 NOW GET OUT OF THAT GROSS HAIRY DIRT WATER AND
 SIT ON THE EDGE OF THAT THERE BATHTUB. TAKE A
 HANDFUL OF THAT SWEET GOOP AND RUB IT ALL OVER
 THAT SKIN OF YOURS(just dont use this stuff on or near
 your lady bits i put this in lower case because it is really
 important your love cavern does not like sugar uh uh no way
 its diabetic) RUB RUB RUB KEEP RUBBIN YEAH YOUR
 HANDS STARTING TO FEEL WEIRD GOOD BECAUSE ITS
 WORKING
 NOW TAKE THAT CHEAP-ASS DISPOSABLE RAZOR YOU
 HAVE AND SHAVE OFF THAT NASTY-ASS DEAD SKIN
 EWW ITS SO GROSS NO ITS NOT ITS YOUR OWN SKIN
 BUT ITS ALL GREY. RINSE OF THAT OILY STUFF
 BECAUSE YOUR SKIN AINT NO SLIP-N-SLIDE
 GOOD NOW FEEL YOUR NEWFOUND SOFT SKIN THAT
 WAS ONCE BURIED UNDER LAYERS OF DEAD FLAKES OF
 YOUR PAST SELF YOUR WELCOME MOTHERFUCKERS
 CLASS DISMISSED
 of only they taught beauty class like this
Best description of sugar scrub ever.
    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Smells Like: vialsofbrightforgettingpowders
 ALRIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS, TIME FOR SOME LEARNIN
 SO SIT OUR BITCH ASS DOWN AND GET OUT OUR
 NOTEPAD
 THIS SHIT RIGHT HERE IS SUGAR SCRUB. YEAH I KNOW
 YOUVE SEEN IT BEFORE BUT YOU DONT KNOW WHAT I
 KNOW AND THAT WHEN YOU USE IT WITH ONE OF THESE
 FUCKERS
 YOU WILL GET LEGS AND ARMS AND ANY OTHER SHIT
 YOU WANT THAT IS SO SOFT YOU WILL BE SHOVING IT IN
 THE FACE OF EVERYONE YOU KNOW AND ASKING THEM
 TO COMPARE IT TO THE TENDER PINK FLESH OF A
 NEWBORN
 sO GET YOURSELF SOME FUCKING WHITE SUGAR AND
 SOME CHEAP ASS OIL LIKE CANOLA OR SOME SHIT AND
 MIX THAT SHIT WITH TWO PARTS SUGAR AND ONE PART
 OIL( THAT MEANS TWICE AS MUCH SUGAR AS OIL
 BITCHES I USUALLY USE ONE CUP OF SUGAR AND DO
 SOME FUCKING MATH TO FIGURE OUT HOW MUCH OIL
 THAT IS) DROP A FEW DROPS OF VANILLA ESSENCE OR
 MAYBE SOME FUCKING LAVENDER OIL WHATEVER YOU
 WANNA SMELL LIKE. MIX IT UP REALLY GOOD MMMM
 SMELLS LIKE CAKE BATTER FUCK YEAH.
 NOW GET YOURSELF GOOD AND NAKED. REAL NAKED
 PAMPER YOUR GODDESS-LIKE ASS WITHA BUBBLE
 BATH. TAKE ONE OF THOSE RAZORS YOU GOT AND
 SHAVE WHATEVER YOU LIKE TO SHAVE LEGS ARMS
 VAJAYJAY PITS I DONT FUCKING CARE
 NOW GET OUT OF THAT GROSS HAIRY DIRT WATER AND
 SIT ON THE EDGE OF THAT THERE BATHTUB. TAKE A
 HANDFUL OF THAT SWEET GOOP AND RUB IT ALL OVER
 THAT SKIN OF YOURS(just dont use this stuff on or near
 your lady bits i put this in lower case because it is really
 important your love cavern does not like sugar uh uh no way
 its diabetic) RUB RUB RUB KEEP RUBBIN YEAH YOUR
 HANDS STARTING TO FEEL WEIRD GOOD BECAUSE ITS
 WORKING
 NOW TAKE THAT CHEAP-ASS DISPOSABLE RAZOR YOU
 HAVE AND SHAVE OFF THAT NASTY-ASS DEAD SKIN
 EWW ITS SO GROSS NO ITS NOT ITS YOUR OWN SKIN
 BUT ITS ALL GREY. RINSE OF THAT OILY STUFF
 BECAUSE YOUR SKIN AINT NO SLIP-N-SLIDE
 GOOD NOW FEEL YOUR NEWFOUND SOFT SKIN THAT
 WAS ONCE BURIED UNDER LAYERS OF DEAD FLAKES OF
 YOUR PAST SELF YOUR WELCOME MOTHERFUCKERS
 CLASS DISMISSED
 of only they taught beauty class like this
Best description of sugar scrub ever.
                
            

            
            
Best description of sugar scrub ever.

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                







    Smells Like: dex
 ORIGINAL
 NOV
 Windex the Bean
 15

 726.
 2113
 Paint the Bean black so they can't Windex it
 NOV
 13

 726.
 2113
 Paint
 Thinner
 Pour Paint Thinner On The Bean After They
 Paint It Black So We Can Windex
 NOV
 13
frnkjpeg:
debthestoner:

rrdcooc:

addakax:

mysticalalleycat:

politicalcdnmama:

theresagooseinthemainframe:

0-memento-mori-0:

justaplate:

claydart:

starlitskyes:

frosttrix:

extremedistressorstellarblowjob:

queen-of-heck:


brightoncemore:

todayiwrotenothing:

gay-jesus-probably:

solongstarbird:

akamine-chan:

phantomofthebookstore:

dragonastra:

jasperzilla:

moose-shampoo:
if you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to live in the midwest, this is it. 

You missed some of the best ones 

the best part about it is that the art installation isn’t actually called the Bean. It’s called Cloud Gate, and artist Anish Kapoor (yes, THAT Anish Kapoor) hates that we call it the Bean.
But i mean, look at it. It’s a bean.


How could you forget this one though


I HAD NO FUCKING IDEA THAT THE BEAN WAS CREATED BY ANISH KAPOOR.

someone help me why is anish kapoor important what did he do?

Alright sit down for some Art World Drama bcause this is what I live for.
So, sometime last year (?) science invented Vantablack, which is the darkest possible shade of black. Art world got incredibly excited. But as it needs to be very carefully made in a lab, it’s hard to get a hold of, and is extremely expensive. Enter Anish Kapoor, aka FuckFace McGee. Anish Kapoor buys the rights to Vantablack. He is the only human being on the planet that can legally use it, and he’s kind of a prick about it.
Art world is not thrilled with that.
Enter Stuart Semple.
Stuart Semple is an artist, and also makes pigments to sell in his free time. Stuart Semple is astoundingly pissed about this Vantablack nonsense, and Anish Kapoor’s dickery. Stuart Semple makes a new pigment, the brightest shade of pink ever, called Pinkest Pink, and puts it for sale on the internet. To be bought by everybody except Anish Kapoor. Literally, to purchase, you need to confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, do not associate with him, and will not sell or give the pigment to Anish Kapoor or his associates. Art world has a good laugh, everyone buys Pinkest Pink because it’s awesome, and damn it we deserve something.
Anish Kapoor however is a penis, and will not take this lying down, because HOW DARE he not have literally everything.
Anish Kapoor gets his London associates to buy him a thing of Pinkest Pink, and being such a classy human being, posts a picture to instagram of him with his middle finger covered in Pinkest Pink, captioned with “Up yours. #pink”
Everyone flips shit, because. Y’know. Fuck that guy. Especially Stuart Semple. For context here, Anish Kapoor is one of the richest artists on the planet, and has repeatedly been referred to as everything wrong with the art world, and the epitome of the art worlds elitism problem. He’s a giant douchebag. Meanwhile Stuart Semple makes pigments just to get them out there. He turns 0 profit from his now enourmously popular pigments.
Stuart Semple launches an investigation as to who the fuck leaked Pinkest Pink, and plans to strike back. He does so by releasing two new products. First is Diamond Dust, which is a glitter made from glass, so that a painting is still visible after it’s applied, but glitters like a mofo. It’s the most reflective glitter out there, and is available to everyone who isn’t Anish Kapoor. And it being made of glass, if you stick your finger in there, it’s going to hurt quite a bit, so that was Stuart Semple’s way of saying “shove your middle finger in this, asshole, see what happens”. Except without saying that, because he can get an insult across while still being fucking classy.
He also releases Black 2.0, created with the help of over a thousand artists worldwide.
Black 2.0 is the answer to Vantablack. Black 2.0 is a slightly less black black, but looks functionally the same to the human eye. It’s completely safe, smells like cherries, and costs four pounds. Vantablack is highly toxic, potentially explosive, needs to be applied in a special laboratory and sealed properly, can’t be moved across borders, can reach 300 degrees celsius if you’re not extremely careful, and costs thousands of dollars. Anish Kapoor is the only human being who can use Vantablack. He is the only human being who cannot use Black 2.0.
So I think we can guess who got the better deal.
And thus the feud ends, Kapoor defeated.
…But not quite.
Kapoor, in this entire afair, has made exactly two comments to the public. The first being his charming message about aquiring Pinkest Pink, the second being claiming to Buzzfeed that he and his small army of lawyers will be suing Semple, an extremely poor artist who cannot afford a lawyer.
No lawsuit has been made yet, fyi.
The point is, Kapoor is a prick, and doesn’t like talking to the lower classes. So one day in July 2017, he decides he needs another floor on his London studio apartment, and starts making arrangements to have it built. His neighbors are fucking pissed, because this will ruin the light of their apartments. They call to Semple to save them, or at the very least piss Kapoor off some more.
Semple answers to the call, and releases two new paints, Phaze and Shift, as always, banned to Kapoor. They change colours, Phaze with temperature, and Shift is just iridescent. Shift needs to be painted over Black 2.0 to work, and Phaze just works on its own.
So that’s been the art world for the last two years.
Basically, get fucked Anish Kapoor your bean sucks and so does your vantablack.

Stuart Semple is organising a bean-kissing event for Anish Kapoor’s birthday.


Reblogging for “By attending this event you confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, you are in no way affiliated with Anish Kapoor, you are not attending on behalf of Anish Kapoor or an associate of Anish Kapoor. To the best of your knowledge, information, and belief this event will not be attended by Anish Kapoor.”


ALSO HE JUST POSTED THIS!!!!!! LIGHTEST LIGHT!


I know this isn’t my art blog but this entire post gives me life 

im sorry is that man holding a real actual miniature star in his hands

Y’all missed the best part about the lightest light, called aptly ‘Lit’. This is from their product page:

Two things:
1. “Anish Kapoor is however a penis” is the best line in this post.
2. I wish to be half as petty and half as awesome as Stuart Semple


I hope Stuart Semple is making a lot of money. What a good person.

Go support him the paint’s are pretty cheap and you get the added bonus of being one of many to help piss off Anish Kapoor


He is my fucking role model for pettiness oh my god 


It got better! I’m also excited because he just released biodegradable glitter in non plastic containers! How amazing is that?! Stuart Semple, good guy for the planet and artists, fighter against the rich elite artist like asshole Kapoor.


An older project, but he also did this:
(x)

oh dude hes metal as fuck 

Every addition to this post is better than the last.


Me, being gay and having my blood drawn: so…what do you need my blood for again?
Stuart Semple: gonna make an anti-government t-shirt with it.
Me:
Me: :)


After seeing this, I wanted to go look more into Stuart semple’s stuff, and I found this
With this in the description 
“Anyone*” I wonder who he could want to not have any England??? 
Stuart semple is great and he is out here fighting with wonderful pettiness

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Smells Like: dex
 ORIGINAL
 NOV
 Windex the Bean
 15

 726.
 2113
 Paint the Bean black so they can't Windex it
 NOV
 13

 726.
 2113
 Paint
 Thinner
 Pour Paint Thinner On The Bean After They
 Paint It Black So We Can Windex
 NOV
 13
frnkjpeg:
debthestoner:

rrdcooc:

addakax:

mysticalalleycat:

politicalcdnmama:

theresagooseinthemainframe:

0-memento-mori-0:

justaplate:

claydart:

starlitskyes:

frosttrix:

extremedistressorstellarblowjob:

queen-of-heck:


brightoncemore:

todayiwrotenothing:

gay-jesus-probably:

solongstarbird:

akamine-chan:

phantomofthebookstore:

dragonastra:

jasperzilla:

moose-shampoo:
if you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to live in the midwest, this is it. 

You missed some of the best ones 

the best part about it is that the art installation isn’t actually called the Bean. It’s called Cloud Gate, and artist Anish Kapoor (yes, THAT Anish Kapoor) hates that we call it the Bean.
But i mean, look at it. It’s a bean.


How could you forget this one though


I HAD NO FUCKING IDEA THAT THE BEAN WAS CREATED BY ANISH KAPOOR.

someone help me why is anish kapoor important what did he do?

Alright sit down for some Art World Drama bcause this is what I live for.
So, sometime last year (?) science invented Vantablack, which is the darkest possible shade of black. Art world got incredibly excited. But as it needs to be very carefully made in a lab, it’s hard to get a hold of, and is extremely expensive. Enter Anish Kapoor, aka FuckFace McGee. Anish Kapoor buys the rights to Vantablack. He is the only human being on the planet that can legally use it, and he’s kind of a prick about it.
Art world is not thrilled with that.
Enter Stuart Semple.
Stuart Semple is an artist, and also makes pigments to sell in his free time. Stuart Semple is astoundingly pissed about this Vantablack nonsense, and Anish Kapoor’s dickery. Stuart Semple makes a new pigment, the brightest shade of pink ever, called Pinkest Pink, and puts it for sale on the internet. To be bought by everybody except Anish Kapoor. Literally, to purchase, you need to confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, do not associate with him, and will not sell or give the pigment to Anish Kapoor or his associates. Art world has a good laugh, everyone buys Pinkest Pink because it’s awesome, and damn it we deserve something.
Anish Kapoor however is a penis, and will not take this lying down, because HOW DARE he not have literally everything.
Anish Kapoor gets his London associates to buy him a thing of Pinkest Pink, and being such a classy human being, posts a picture to instagram of him with his middle finger covered in Pinkest Pink, captioned with “Up yours. #pink”
Everyone flips shit, because. Y’know. Fuck that guy. Especially Stuart Semple. For context here, Anish Kapoor is one of the richest artists on the planet, and has repeatedly been referred to as everything wrong with the art world, and the epitome of the art worlds elitism problem. He’s a giant douchebag. Meanwhile Stuart Semple makes pigments just to get them out there. He turns 0 profit from his now enourmously popular pigments.
Stuart Semple launches an investigation as to who the fuck leaked Pinkest Pink, and plans to strike back. He does so by releasing two new products. First is Diamond Dust, which is a glitter made from glass, so that a painting is still visible after it’s applied, but glitters like a mofo. It’s the most reflective glitter out there, and is available to everyone who isn’t Anish Kapoor. And it being made of glass, if you stick your finger in there, it’s going to hurt quite a bit, so that was Stuart Semple’s way of saying “shove your middle finger in this, asshole, see what happens”. Except without saying that, because he can get an insult across while still being fucking classy.
He also releases Black 2.0, created with the help of over a thousand artists worldwide.
Black 2.0 is the answer to Vantablack. Black 2.0 is a slightly less black black, but looks functionally the same to the human eye. It’s completely safe, smells like cherries, and costs four pounds. Vantablack is highly toxic, potentially explosive, needs to be applied in a special laboratory and sealed properly, can’t be moved across borders, can reach 300 degrees celsius if you’re not extremely careful, and costs thousands of dollars. Anish Kapoor is the only human being who can use Vantablack. He is the only human being who cannot use Black 2.0.
So I think we can guess who got the better deal.
And thus the feud ends, Kapoor defeated.
…But not quite.
Kapoor, in this entire afair, has made exactly two comments to the public. The first being his charming message about aquiring Pinkest Pink, the second being claiming to Buzzfeed that he and his small army of lawyers will be suing Semple, an extremely poor artist who cannot afford a lawyer.
No lawsuit has been made yet, fyi.
The point is, Kapoor is a prick, and doesn’t like talking to the lower classes. So one day in July 2017, he decides he needs another floor on his London studio apartment, and starts making arrangements to have it built. His neighbors are fucking pissed, because this will ruin the light of their apartments. They call to Semple to save them, or at the very least piss Kapoor off some more.
Semple answers to the call, and releases two new paints, Phaze and Shift, as always, banned to Kapoor. They change colours, Phaze with temperature, and Shift is just iridescent. Shift needs to be painted over Black 2.0 to work, and Phaze just works on its own.
So that’s been the art world for the last two years.
Basically, get fucked Anish Kapoor your bean sucks and so does your vantablack.

Stuart Semple is organising a bean-kissing event for Anish Kapoor’s birthday.


Reblogging for “By attending this event you confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, you are in no way affiliated with Anish Kapoor, you are not attending on behalf of Anish Kapoor or an associate of Anish Kapoor. To the best of your knowledge, information, and belief this event will not be attended by Anish Kapoor.”


ALSO HE JUST POSTED THIS!!!!!! LIGHTEST LIGHT!


I know this isn’t my art blog but this entire post gives me life 

im sorry is that man holding a real actual miniature star in his hands

Y’all missed the best part about the lightest light, called aptly ‘Lit’. This is from their product page:

Two things:
1. “Anish Kapoor is however a penis” is the best line in this post.
2. I wish to be half as petty and half as awesome as Stuart Semple


I hope Stuart Semple is making a lot of money. What a good person.

Go support him the paint’s are pretty cheap and you get the added bonus of being one of many to help piss off Anish Kapoor


He is my fucking role model for pettiness oh my god 


It got better! I’m also excited because he just released biodegradable glitter in non plastic containers! How amazing is that?! Stuart Semple, good guy for the planet and artists, fighter against the rich elite artist like asshole Kapoor.


An older project, but he also did this:
(x)

oh dude hes metal as fuck 

Every addition to this post is better than the last.


Me, being gay and having my blood drawn: so…what do you need my blood for again?
Stuart Semple: gonna make an anti-government t-shirt with it.
Me:
Me: :)


After seeing this, I wanted to go look more into Stuart semple’s stuff, and I found this
With this in the description 
“Anyone*” I wonder who he could want to not have any England??? 
Stuart semple is great and he is out here fighting with wonderful pettiness

                
            

            
            
frnkjpeg:
debthestoner:

rrdcooc:

addakax:

mysticalalleycat:

politicalcdnmama:

theresagooseinthemainframe:

0-memento-mori-0:

justap...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                







    Smells Like: Kaytlyn Marie Stone Great Pyrenees and Their Crazy
 Antics
 3 hrs
 My beautiful boy!
 Like
 Comment
gardeninthevoid:

thathighclassbitch:

how-to-train-your-writer:


thathighclassbitch:

speciesofleastconcern:

teapotsahoy:

twentyghosts:

queerautism:

actualdisasterbi:

republicansareahategroup:

scifinut:


missanthropicprinciple:

mcdyke:

lesbian-lizards:


jimmyfury:

iskariotrising:

PEOPLE ARE SO CONCERNED ABOUT THIS DOGS MASCULINITY
HES A DOG

no you don’t understand. People freak the fuck out if you don’t enforce human gender roles on dogs. They get fucking belligerent. I work in a pet store and the number of times people have gotten LIVID with me for not just automatically assuming their dog not only required but personally wanted the most stringent enforcement of human gender norms is mindblowing.
People demand dog shampoos that smell “masculine” because “He’s a boy he doesn’t want to smell like flowers” even though he’s a dog and if he had his way he would smell like duck poop. And those shampoos exist! That’s the worst part! There’s enough demand for dog shampoo that smells like Axe body spray that they exist and they sell well.
Or the seemingly nice old lady that shouted “PINK! OBVIOUSLY! SHE’S GIRL SHE HATES OTHER COLORS!” at me when i asked what color harness she wanted for her lapdog. Even though her dog can’t actually see the color pink and does not now and will not ever give a single flying dog fart what color her harness is.

Even our pets have to deal with our gender socialization bullshit.


I work in a pet store. Can confirm. If I don’t know the sex of the dog, and say, I pick up a blue lead to show the customer it’s different uses, I’ll get “well she’s a girl, so” and I’m like? Um? I’m just showing you it’s functions, there’s like 20 different colours here you can choose from? 
And my manager wants us to separate boys coats/accessories and girl coats/accessories for accessibility for the customers……. like…….?

??????? They’re dogs.

This. Is. BULLSHIT.Also, when I worked at a grooming salon, one groomer would bring in her family’s dogs. Poms, the lot of them. They all got bows. Even the boy. He was a goddamn beautiful dog.Customers got mad. About a boy dog wearing bows. A boy dog THAT WAS NOT THEIR DOG wearing bows. Let that sink in.


Actually just like a week ago someone got testy with me because I put my female chihuahua in a blue polo shirt and they were like “she’s a girl she looks like a boy in that” and I was just like… She’s a dog.

I am so tempted to put the biggest fucking pink bow I can find on my dog and parade him around the neighborhood. 
Fuck this gender roles bullshit.  He’s a 12 year old dumbass who sometimes falls down the ONE (1) step on our porch because he gets too excited and forgets that he has back legs that don’t work right (vet says it’s a degenerative nerve thing, common in older labs).  HE WOULD GLADLY ROLL IN HIS OWN SHIT IF WE LET HIM - HE COULDN’T GIVE TWO FUCKS IF HE IS IN A BOW OR A BANDANA, I PROMISE.


My puppy wears bandanas sometimes, including a really cute pink one with white hearts that I love. One time this old lady at the park was absolutely BAFFLED that I would put a pink thing on my Boy Dog. Literally accused me of trying to confuse people, asked why I’d put that on him. I was just??? It’s cute and I like it the puppy really couldn’t give less of a shit 

My cat Duarte is male and he wears a pink collar with a tag that says “Beautiful Angel Princess” on the side that doesn’t have my contact info, because he’s my beautiful angel princess obv, and it throws the vet staff for a LOOP every time

People get upset when I walk boy dogs with my hot pink leash (because I lose leashes, so I like them highly visible.Like, 
one, maybe this dog has Victorian gender norms, and considers pink very masculine? two: it’s not the dog’s leash, it’s mine.

People putting gender norms on house pets is wild. They’re just living cuddle bears they don’t have gender.


The person who grooms our dog always puts little bows on his harness. Adorable. 

OH NO, NUGGET! TAKE THAT SHIRT OFF. THAT’S NOT M A N L Y, NUGGET!
OH NO HE’S WEARING AIRPODS HE CAN’T HEAR ME OH NO! 


Oh n o oh gfpd I’m shahmking I m cr yjiing

i was so fucking angry reading this post and then you blessed me with nugget

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Smells Like: Kaytlyn Marie Stone Great Pyrenees and Their Crazy
 Antics
 3 hrs
 My beautiful boy!
 Like
 Comment
gardeninthevoid:

thathighclassbitch:

how-to-train-your-writer:


thathighclassbitch:

speciesofleastconcern:

teapotsahoy:

twentyghosts:

queerautism:

actualdisasterbi:

republicansareahategroup:

scifinut:


missanthropicprinciple:

mcdyke:

lesbian-lizards:


jimmyfury:

iskariotrising:

PEOPLE ARE SO CONCERNED ABOUT THIS DOGS MASCULINITY
HES A DOG

no you don’t understand. People freak the fuck out if you don’t enforce human gender roles on dogs. They get fucking belligerent. I work in a pet store and the number of times people have gotten LIVID with me for not just automatically assuming their dog not only required but personally wanted the most stringent enforcement of human gender norms is mindblowing.
People demand dog shampoos that smell “masculine” because “He’s a boy he doesn’t want to smell like flowers” even though he’s a dog and if he had his way he would smell like duck poop. And those shampoos exist! That’s the worst part! There’s enough demand for dog shampoo that smells like Axe body spray that they exist and they sell well.
Or the seemingly nice old lady that shouted “PINK! OBVIOUSLY! SHE’S GIRL SHE HATES OTHER COLORS!” at me when i asked what color harness she wanted for her lapdog. Even though her dog can’t actually see the color pink and does not now and will not ever give a single flying dog fart what color her harness is.

Even our pets have to deal with our gender socialization bullshit.


I work in a pet store. Can confirm. If I don’t know the sex of the dog, and say, I pick up a blue lead to show the customer it’s different uses, I’ll get “well she’s a girl, so” and I’m like? Um? I’m just showing you it’s functions, there’s like 20 different colours here you can choose from? 
And my manager wants us to separate boys coats/accessories and girl coats/accessories for accessibility for the customers……. like…….?

??????? They’re dogs.

This. Is. BULLSHIT.Also, when I worked at a grooming salon, one groomer would bring in her family’s dogs. Poms, the lot of them. They all got bows. Even the boy. He was a goddamn beautiful dog.Customers got mad. About a boy dog wearing bows. A boy dog THAT WAS NOT THEIR DOG wearing bows. Let that sink in.


Actually just like a week ago someone got testy with me because I put my female chihuahua in a blue polo shirt and they were like “she’s a girl she looks like a boy in that” and I was just like… She’s a dog.

I am so tempted to put the biggest fucking pink bow I can find on my dog and parade him around the neighborhood. 
Fuck this gender roles bullshit.  He’s a 12 year old dumbass who sometimes falls down the ONE (1) step on our porch because he gets too excited and forgets that he has back legs that don’t work right (vet says it’s a degenerative nerve thing, common in older labs).  HE WOULD GLADLY ROLL IN HIS OWN SHIT IF WE LET HIM - HE COULDN’T GIVE TWO FUCKS IF HE IS IN A BOW OR A BANDANA, I PROMISE.


My puppy wears bandanas sometimes, including a really cute pink one with white hearts that I love. One time this old lady at the park was absolutely BAFFLED that I would put a pink thing on my Boy Dog. Literally accused me of trying to confuse people, asked why I’d put that on him. I was just??? It’s cute and I like it the puppy really couldn’t give less of a shit 

My cat Duarte is male and he wears a pink collar with a tag that says “Beautiful Angel Princess” on the side that doesn’t have my contact info, because he’s my beautiful angel princess obv, and it throws the vet staff for a LOOP every time

People get upset when I walk boy dogs with my hot pink leash (because I lose leashes, so I like them highly visible.Like, 
one, maybe this dog has Victorian gender norms, and considers pink very masculine? two: it’s not the dog’s leash, it’s mine.

People putting gender norms on house pets is wild. They’re just living cuddle bears they don’t have gender.


The person who grooms our dog always puts little bows on his harness. Adorable. 

OH NO, NUGGET! TAKE THAT SHIRT OFF. THAT’S NOT M A N L Y, NUGGET!
OH NO HE’S WEARING AIRPODS HE CAN’T HEAR ME OH NO! 


Oh n o oh gfpd I’m shahmking I m cr yjiing

i was so fucking angry reading this post and then you blessed me with nugget

                
            

            
            
gardeninthevoid:

thathighclassbitch:

how-to-train-your-writer:


thathighclassbitch:

speciesofleastconcern:

teapotsahoy:

twentyghost...

            
            
        

    



            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                






            

        

        
        

            

                







    Smells Like: dex
 ORIGINAL
 NOV
 Windex the Bean
 15

 726.
 2113
 Paint the Bean black so they can't Windex it
 NOV
 13

 726.
 2113
 Paint
 Thinner
 Pour Paint Thinner On The Bean After They
 Paint It Black So We Can Windex
 NOV
 13
debthestoner:

rrdcooc:

addakax:

mysticalalleycat:

politicalcdnmama:

theresagooseinthemainframe:

0-memento-mori-0:

justaplate:

claydart:

starlitskyes:

frosttrix:

extremedistressorstellarblowjob:

queen-of-heck:


brightoncemore:

todayiwrotenothing:

gay-jesus-probably:

solongstarbird:

akamine-chan:

phantomofthebookstore:

dragonastra:

jasperzilla:

moose-shampoo:
if you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to live in the midwest, this is it. 

You missed some of the best ones 

the best part about it is that the art installation isn’t actually called the Bean. It’s called Cloud Gate, and artist Anish Kapoor (yes, THAT Anish Kapoor) hates that we call it the Bean.
But i mean, look at it. It’s a bean.


How could you forget this one though


I HAD NO FUCKING IDEA THAT THE BEAN WAS CREATED BY ANISH KAPOOR.

someone help me why is anish kapoor important what did he do?

Alright sit down for some Art World Drama bcause this is what I live for.
So, sometime last year (?) science invented Vantablack, which is the darkest possible shade of black. Art world got incredibly excited. But as it needs to be very carefully made in a lab, it’s hard to get a hold of, and is extremely expensive. Enter Anish Kapoor, aka FuckFace McGee. Anish Kapoor buys the rights to Vantablack. He is the only human being on the planet that can legally use it, and he’s kind of a prick about it.
Art world is not thrilled with that.
Enter Stuart Semple.
Stuart Semple is an artist, and also makes pigments to sell in his free time. Stuart Semple is astoundingly pissed about this Vantablack nonsense, and Anish Kapoor’s dickery. Stuart Semple makes a new pigment, the brightest shade of pink ever, called Pinkest Pink, and puts it for sale on the internet. To be bought by everybody except Anish Kapoor. Literally, to purchase, you need to confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, do not associate with him, and will not sell or give the pigment to Anish Kapoor or his associates. Art world has a good laugh, everyone buys Pinkest Pink because it’s awesome, and damn it we deserve something.
Anish Kapoor however is a penis, and will not take this lying down, because HOW DARE he not have literally everything.
Anish Kapoor gets his London associates to buy him a thing of Pinkest Pink, and being such a classy human being, posts a picture to instagram of him with his middle finger covered in Pinkest Pink, captioned with “Up yours. #pink”
Everyone flips shit, because. Y’know. Fuck that guy. Especially Stuart Semple. For context here, Anish Kapoor is one of the richest artists on the planet, and has repeatedly been referred to as everything wrong with the art world, and the epitome of the art worlds elitism problem. He’s a giant douchebag. Meanwhile Stuart Semple makes pigments just to get them out there. He turns 0 profit from his now enourmously popular pigments.
Stuart Semple launches an investigation as to who the fuck leaked Pinkest Pink, and plans to strike back. He does so by releasing two new products. First is Diamond Dust, which is a glitter made from glass, so that a painting is still visible after it’s applied, but glitters like a mofo. It’s the most reflective glitter out there, and is available to everyone who isn’t Anish Kapoor. And it being made of glass, if you stick your finger in there, it’s going to hurt quite a bit, so that was Stuart Semple’s way of saying “shove your middle finger in this, asshole, see what happens”. Except without saying that, because he can get an insult across while still being fucking classy.
He also releases Black 2.0, created with the help of over a thousand artists worldwide.
Black 2.0 is the answer to Vantablack. Black 2.0 is a slightly less black black, but looks functionally the same to the human eye. It’s completely safe, smells like cherries, and costs four pounds. Vantablack is highly toxic, potentially explosive, needs to be applied in a special laboratory and sealed properly, can’t be moved across borders, can reach 300 degrees celsius if you’re not extremely careful, and costs thousands of dollars. Anish Kapoor is the only human being who can use Vantablack. He is the only human being who cannot use Black 2.0.
So I think we can guess who got the better deal.
And thus the feud ends, Kapoor defeated.
…But not quite.
Kapoor, in this entire afair, has made exactly two comments to the public. The first being his charming message about aquiring Pinkest Pink, the second being claiming to Buzzfeed that he and his small army of lawyers will be suing Semple, an extremely poor artist who cannot afford a lawyer.
No lawsuit has been made yet, fyi.
The point is, Kapoor is a prick, and doesn’t like talking to the lower classes. So one day in July 2017, he decides he needs another floor on his London studio apartment, and starts making arrangements to have it built. His neighbors are fucking pissed, because this will ruin the light of their apartments. They call to Semple to save them, or at the very least piss Kapoor off some more.
Semple answers to the call, and releases two new paints, Phaze and Shift, as always, banned to Kapoor. They change colours, Phaze with temperature, and Shift is just iridescent. Shift needs to be painted over Black 2.0 to work, and Phaze just works on its own.
So that’s been the art world for the last two years.
Basically, get fucked Anish Kapoor your bean sucks and so does your vantablack.

Stuart Semple is organising a bean-kissing event for Anish Kapoor’s birthday.


Reblogging for “By attending this event you confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, you are in no way affiliated with Anish Kapoor, you are not attending on behalf of Anish Kapoor or an associate of Anish Kapoor. To the best of your knowledge, information, and belief this event will not be attended by Anish Kapoor.”


ALSO HE JUST POSTED THIS!!!!!! LIGHTEST LIGHT!


I know this isn’t my art blog but this entire post gives me life 

im sorry is that man holding a real actual miniature star in his hands

Y’all missed the best part about the lightest light, called aptly ‘Lit’. This is from their product page:

Two things:
1. “Anish Kapoor is however a penis” is the best line in this post.
2. I wish to be half as petty and half as awesome as Stuart Semple


I hope Stuart Semple is making a lot of money. What a good person.

Go support him the paint’s are pretty cheap and you get the added bonus of being one of many to help piss off Anish Kapoor


He is my fucking role model for pettiness oh my god 


It got better! I’m also excited because he just released biodegradable glitter in non plastic containers! How amazing is that?! Stuart Semple, good guy for the planet and artists, fighter against the rich elite artist like asshole Kapoor.


An older project, but he also did this:
(x)

oh dude hes metal as fuck 

Every addition to this post is better than the last.


Me, being gay and having my blood drawn: so…what do you need my blood for again?
Stuart Semple: gonna make an anti-government t-shirt with it.
Me:
Me: :)

    

        
        
        
        
        
        
        
        
    

    

        

            
            

                
                Smells Like: dex
 ORIGINAL
 NOV
 Windex the Bean
 15

 726.
 2113
 Paint the Bean black so they can't Windex it
 NOV
 13

 726.
 2113
 Paint
 Thinner
 Pour Paint Thinner On The Bean After They
 Paint It Black So We Can Windex
 NOV
 13
debthestoner:

rrdcooc:

addakax:

mysticalalleycat:

politicalcdnmama:

theresagooseinthemainframe:

0-memento-mori-0:

justaplate:

claydart:

starlitskyes:

frosttrix:

extremedistressorstellarblowjob:

queen-of-heck:


brightoncemore:

todayiwrotenothing:

gay-jesus-probably:

solongstarbird:

akamine-chan:

phantomofthebookstore:

dragonastra:

jasperzilla:

moose-shampoo:
if you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to live in the midwest, this is it. 

You missed some of the best ones 

the best part about it is that the art installation isn’t actually called the Bean. It’s called Cloud Gate, and artist Anish Kapoor (yes, THAT Anish Kapoor) hates that we call it the Bean.
But i mean, look at it. It’s a bean.


How could you forget this one though


I HAD NO FUCKING IDEA THAT THE BEAN WAS CREATED BY ANISH KAPOOR.

someone help me why is anish kapoor important what did he do?

Alright sit down for some Art World Drama bcause this is what I live for.
So, sometime last year (?) science invented Vantablack, which is the darkest possible shade of black. Art world got incredibly excited. But as it needs to be very carefully made in a lab, it’s hard to get a hold of, and is extremely expensive. Enter Anish Kapoor, aka FuckFace McGee. Anish Kapoor buys the rights to Vantablack. He is the only human being on the planet that can legally use it, and he’s kind of a prick about it.
Art world is not thrilled with that.
Enter Stuart Semple.
Stuart Semple is an artist, and also makes pigments to sell in his free time. Stuart Semple is astoundingly pissed about this Vantablack nonsense, and Anish Kapoor’s dickery. Stuart Semple makes a new pigment, the brightest shade of pink ever, called Pinkest Pink, and puts it for sale on the internet. To be bought by everybody except Anish Kapoor. Literally, to purchase, you need to confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, do not associate with him, and will not sell or give the pigment to Anish Kapoor or his associates. Art world has a good laugh, everyone buys Pinkest Pink because it’s awesome, and damn it we deserve something.
Anish Kapoor however is a penis, and will not take this lying down, because HOW DARE he not have literally everything.
Anish Kapoor gets his London associates to buy him a thing of Pinkest Pink, and being such a classy human being, posts a picture to instagram of him with his middle finger covered in Pinkest Pink, captioned with “Up yours. #pink”
Everyone flips shit, because. Y’know. Fuck that guy. Especially Stuart Semple. For context here, Anish Kapoor is one of the richest artists on the planet, and has repeatedly been referred to as everything wrong with the art world, and the epitome of the art worlds elitism problem. He’s a giant douchebag. Meanwhile Stuart Semple makes pigments just to get them out there. He turns 0 profit from his now enourmously popular pigments.
Stuart Semple launches an investigation as to who the fuck leaked Pinkest Pink, and plans to strike back. He does so by releasing two new products. First is Diamond Dust, which is a glitter made from glass, so that a painting is still visible after it’s applied, but glitters like a mofo. It’s the most reflective glitter out there, and is available to everyone who isn’t Anish Kapoor. And it being made of glass, if you stick your finger in there, it’s going to hurt quite a bit, so that was Stuart Semple’s way of saying “shove your middle finger in this, asshole, see what happens”. Except without saying that, because he can get an insult across while still being fucking classy.
He also releases Black 2.0, created with the help of over a thousand artists worldwide.
Black 2.0 is the answer to Vantablack. Black 2.0 is a slightly less black black, but looks functionally the same to the human eye. It’s completely safe, smells like cherries, and costs four pounds. Vantablack is highly toxic, potentially explosive, needs to be applied in a special laboratory and sealed properly, can’t be moved across borders, can reach 300 degrees celsius if you’re not extremely careful, and costs thousands of dollars. Anish Kapoor is the only human being who can use Vantablack. He is the only human being who cannot use Black 2.0.
So I think we can guess who got the better deal.
And thus the feud ends, Kapoor defeated.
…But not quite.
Kapoor, in this entire afair, has made exactly two comments to the public. The first being his charming message about aquiring Pinkest Pink, the second being claiming to Buzzfeed that he and his small army of lawyers will be suing Semple, an extremely poor artist who cannot afford a lawyer.
No lawsuit has been made yet, fyi.
The point is, Kapoor is a prick, and doesn’t like talking to the lower classes. So one day in July 2017, he decides he needs another floor on his London studio apartment, and starts making arrangements to have it built. His neighbors are fucking pissed, because this will ruin the light of their apartments. They call to Semple to save them, or at the very least piss Kapoor off some more.
Semple answers to the call, and releases two new paints, Phaze and Shift, as always, banned to Kapoor. They change colours, Phaze with temperature, and Shift is just iridescent. Shift needs to be painted over Black 2.0 to work, and Phaze just works on its own.
So that’s been the art world for the last two years.
Basically, get fucked Anish Kapoor your bean sucks and so does your vantablack.

Stuart Semple is organising a bean-kissing event for Anish Kapoor’s birthday.


Reblogging for “By attending this event you confirm that you are not Anish Kapoor, you are in no way affiliated with Anish Kapoor, you are not attending on behalf of Anish Kapoor or an associate of Anish Kapoor. To the best of your knowledge, information, and belief this event will not be attended by Anish Kapoor.”


ALSO HE JUST POSTED THIS!!!!!! LIGHTEST LIGHT!


I know this isn’t my art blog but this entire post gives me life 

im sorry is that man holding a real actual miniature star in his hands

Y’all missed the best part about the lightest light, called aptly ‘Lit’. This is from their product page:

Two things:
1. “Anish Kapoor is however a penis” is the best line in this post.
2. I wish to be half as petty and half as awesome as Stuart Semple


I hope Stuart Semple is making a lot of money. What a good person.

Go support him the paint’s are pretty cheap and you get the added bonus of being one of many to help piss off Anish Kapoor


He is my fucking role model for pettiness oh my god 


It got better! I’m also excited because he just released biodegradable glitter in non plastic containers! How amazing is that?! Stuart Semple, good guy for the planet and artists, fighter against the rich elite artist like asshole Kapoor.


An older project, but he also did this:
(x)

oh dude hes metal as fuck 

Every addition to this post is better than the last.


Me, being gay and having my blood drawn: so…what do you need my blood for again?
Stuart Semple: gonna make an anti-government t-shirt with it.
Me:
Me: :)

                
            

            
            
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