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Anna, Christmas, and Family: REI TILtilthat I L TIL that Spain had a king who was so malformed due to incest that he couldn't close his mouth and ended up destroying his entire dynasty via ift.tt neeetsocks thats just how spaniards be whittneydoll hey lil mama lemme whisper in ya ear friendly-neighborhood-patriarch the monumental ugliness of El Hechizado always astonishes me nunyabizni The Hapsburg's were a unique bunch weren't they nobodys-favorite-machinist The Ancestry of King Charles II of Spain (1661-1700) Philip of Castile (1478-1505) Joanna of Castile (1479-1555) Charles V. Holy Roman Emperor (1500-58) Isabella of Portugal (1503-39) Isabella of Burgundy (1501-26 Anna of Bohemia and Hungary (1503-47 Ferdinand I, Holy Roman Emperor (1503-64) Christian I of Denmark (1481-1559) Philip of Spain (1527-96) Christina of Denmark (1522-90) Anne of Albert V, Duke Habsburg of Bavaria (1528-90) (1528-79) Mana of Spain (1528-1603) Charles of Austria (1540-90) Maximillan II, Holy Roman Emperor (1527-76) Francis 1, Duke of Lorraine (1517-45 Anne of Austria (1549-80) Maria Anna of Bavaria (1551-1608) Renata of Lorraine (1544-1602) William V, Duke of Bavaria (1548-1626) Margarita of Austria (1584-1611) Philip I of Spain (1578-1621) Maria Anna of Bavaria Ferdinand II, Holy Roman Emperor (1578-1637) (1574-1616 Maria Anna of Spain (1606-46 Philip V of Spain (1605-65) Ferdinand III, Holy Roman Emperor (1608-57) Manana of Austria (1634-96 Charles l of Spain (1661-1700) His family tree was a fucking Christmas wreath. his body "did not contain a single drop of blood his heart was the size of a peppercorn short lame, epileptic senile his lungs corroded: his intestines rotten and gangrenous; completely bald before 35 he had a single testicle, black as coal, always on the verge of death, he repeatedly bafled Christendom by continuing to live his head was ul fwater In case you wanted to know what his coroner thought of him. Spanish History: 30 Times Tumblr Accidentally Taught Me Something While Making Me Laugh
Anna, Christmas, and Family: REI
 TILtilthat
 I L
 TIL that Spain had a king who was so malformed
 due to incest that he couldn't close his mouth and
 ended up destroying his entire dynasty
 via ift.tt
 neeetsocks
 thats just how spaniards be
 whittneydoll
 hey lil mama lemme whisper in ya ear
 friendly-neighborhood-patriarch
 the monumental ugliness of El Hechizado always
 astonishes me
 nunyabizni
 The Hapsburg's were a unique bunch weren't they
 nobodys-favorite-machinist
 The Ancestry of King Charles II of Spain
 (1661-1700)
 Philip of Castile
 (1478-1505)
 Joanna of Castile
 (1479-1555)
 Charles V. Holy
 Roman Emperor
 (1500-58)
 Isabella of
 Portugal
 (1503-39)
 Isabella of
 Burgundy
 (1501-26
 Anna of Bohemia
 and Hungary
 (1503-47
 Ferdinand I, Holy
 Roman Emperor
 (1503-64)
 Christian I
 of Denmark
 (1481-1559)
 Philip
 of Spain
 (1527-96)
 Christina of
 Denmark
 (1522-90)
 Anne of Albert V, Duke
 Habsburg of Bavaria
 (1528-90) (1528-79)
 Mana of
 Spain
 (1528-1603)
 Charles
 of Austria
 (1540-90)
 Maximillan II, Holy
 Roman Emperor
 (1527-76)
 Francis 1, Duke
 of Lorraine
 (1517-45
 Anne of
 Austria
 (1549-80)
 Maria Anna
 of Bavaria
 (1551-1608)
 Renata of
 Lorraine
 (1544-1602)
 William V, Duke
 of Bavaria
 (1548-1626)
 Margarita of
 Austria
 (1584-1611)
 Philip I
 of Spain
 (1578-1621)
 Maria Anna
 of Bavaria
 Ferdinand II, Holy
 Roman Emperor
 (1578-1637)
 (1574-1616
 Maria Anna
 of Spain
 (1606-46
 Philip V
 of Spain
 (1605-65)
 Ferdinand III, Holy
 Roman Emperor
 (1608-57)
 Manana of
 Austria
 (1634-96
 Charles l of Spain
 (1661-1700)
 His family tree was a fucking Christmas wreath.
 his body "did not contain a single drop of blood
 his heart was the size of a peppercorn
 short
 lame, epileptic
 senile
 his lungs corroded:
 his intestines rotten and
 gangrenous;
 completely bald before 35
 he had a single testicle,
 black as coal,
 always on the verge of death,
 he
 repeatedly bafled Christendom by
 continuing to
 live
 his head was ul fwater
 In case you wanted to know what his coroner
 thought of him.
Spanish History: 30 Times Tumblr Accidentally Taught Me Something While Making Me Laugh

Spanish History: 30 Times Tumblr Accidentally Taught Me Something While Making Me Laugh

Crime, Doctor, and Fake: Steven Russell was a con artist who escaped from prison by using laxatives to fake the symptoms of AIDS. He then called the prison, posing as a doctor, asking for prisoners interested in an experimental treatment, and volunteered. Once out of Texas, he sent death certificates to the prison stating he had died. Ultrafacts.tumblr.com monpetitcabbage: rainfallinhell: creppysponge: blackgirlsparadise: How….? STEVEN RUSSELL WAS A FUCKING GENIUS.  Originally arrested for Insurance Fraud, he met the love of his life Phillip Morris in prison He got out before Phillip, so he proceeded to GET PHILLIP OUT OF PRISON He wanted to give Phillip a glamourous life, so he got a big-name job, and then started embezzling funds he was arrested and then broke out TWICE MORE and kept busting out then he was arrested again, and the above happened while he was on the run from this, he was determined to get Phillip (who was in trouble for harboring him) out of prison so he pretended to be a lawyer and hit up Phillip’s jail 24/7. He tried to get Phillip moved to a prison closer to where he was hiding so he couLD VISIT HIM AND THEN he made a fake identity and tried to get a 75k loan, and was arrested AGAIN, but he FAKED A HEART ATTACK AND LEFT BEFORE HE WAS EVEN PLACED IN PRISON AGAIN There’s a movie about his life called “I love you, phillip morris” Starring Jim Carrey and Ewan McGregor Seriously go watch I Love You Philip Morris, it’s literally just a “be gay do crime” rom com there’s no killing your gays or angsty plot messes, the comedy is amazing and it’s sweet and I’d die for it guess what’s going on my to watch list now
Crime, Doctor, and Fake: Steven Russell was a con artist who
 escaped from prison by using laxatives
 to fake the symptoms of AIDS. He then
 called the prison, posing as a doctor,
 asking for prisoners interested in an
 experimental treatment, and
 volunteered. Once out of Texas, he
 sent death certificates to the prison
 stating he had died.
 Ultrafacts.tumblr.com
monpetitcabbage:

rainfallinhell:

creppysponge:

blackgirlsparadise:

How….?

STEVEN RUSSELL WAS A FUCKING GENIUS. 
Originally arrested for Insurance Fraud, he met the love of his life Phillip Morris in prison
He got out before Phillip, so he proceeded to GET PHILLIP OUT OF PRISON
He wanted to give Phillip a glamourous life, so he got a big-name job, and then started embezzling funds
he was arrested and then broke out TWICE MORE and kept busting out
then he was arrested again, and the above happened
while he was on the run from this, he was determined to get Phillip (who was in trouble for harboring him) out of prison so he pretended to be a lawyer and hit up Phillip’s jail 24/7. He tried to get Phillip moved to a prison closer to where he was hiding so he couLD VISIT HIM
AND THEN he made a fake identity and tried to get a 75k loan, and was arrested AGAIN, but he FAKED A HEART ATTACK AND LEFT BEFORE HE WAS EVEN PLACED IN PRISON AGAIN

There’s a movie about his life called “I love you, phillip morris” Starring Jim Carrey and Ewan McGregor


Seriously go watch I Love You Philip Morris, it’s literally just a “be gay do crime” rom com there’s no killing your gays or angsty plot messes, the comedy is amazing and it’s sweet and I’d die for it


guess what’s going on my to watch list now

monpetitcabbage: rainfallinhell: creppysponge: blackgirlsparadise: How….? STEVEN RUSSELL WAS A FUCKING GENIUS.  Originally arrested for...