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๐Ÿ”ฅ | Latest

Ass, College, and Confused: let-the-phoenix-fly: malfkoys my cat has been fucking playing me for weeks, playing me like a fucking harp. I feed my cat twice a day with prescribed diet food because she's really fat and doesn't know when she's full so she never stops eating usually when I come home from class she is all over me like the whore of babylon all over me putting on a pity party and trying to get me to sin and give her more food but no matter what I only feed her the amount of food for her prescribed diet, but after awhile i started noticing that she wasn't loosing weight at all and was actually just getting fatter, so I called the vet pissed and i'm just like the fuck she's still getting fat. so I switched her to another diet food and that still didn't work and I was so confused and frustrated like what is wrong with this cat? so a couple weeks go by and I start noticing that I go through bags of food really fast like a week fast and I remembered how I thought that was so weird like l God honest could not figure out why the food disappeared so fast (my former naive and innocernt mind) well y'all ready here's the fucking climax-the other day my class was canceled and I come downstairs at like noonish and do you know what I see when I get down? I see my fucking cat sitting in the food bin. with my own two eyes I see her sitting in the fucking food bin. my spoiled ass cat has been eating like a fucking queen and living it the fuck up while I'm in class and then pretends like she's hungry when i get home. and you know what's the real kicker? when she leaves the lid gets knocked shut which is why i never caught onto her scam. she's fucking been working the system and playing the food game right under my fucking nose like i want to scream and now I have to call the vet and the morning and explain to him how, a well educated adult in college. got one-upped in intelligence by my fucking cat Read the whole thing what kind of posts do u want cause my stats been like bye bye
Ass, College, and Confused: let-the-phoenix-fly:
 malfkoys
 my cat has been fucking playing me for weeks, playing me like a fucking
 harp. I feed my cat twice a day with prescribed diet food because she's
 really fat and doesn't know when she's full so she never stops eating
 usually when I come home from class she is all over me like the whore of
 babylon all over me putting on a pity party and trying to get me to sin and
 give her more food but no matter what I only feed her the amount of food
 for her prescribed diet, but after awhile i started noticing that she wasn't
 loosing weight at all and was actually just getting fatter, so I called the vet
 pissed and i'm just like the fuck she's still getting fat. so I switched her to
 another diet food and that still didn't work and I was so confused and
 frustrated like what is wrong with this cat? so a couple weeks go by and I
 start noticing that I go through bags of food really fast like a week fast and
 I remembered how I thought that was so weird like l God honest could not
 figure out why the food disappeared so fast (my former naive and innocernt
 mind) well y'all ready here's the fucking climax-the other day my class
 was canceled and I come downstairs at like noonish and do you know
 what I see when I get down? I see my fucking cat sitting in the food bin.
 with my own two eyes I see her sitting in the fucking food bin. my spoiled
 ass cat has been eating like a fucking queen and living it the fuck up while
 I'm in class and then pretends like she's hungry when i get home. and you
 know what's the real kicker? when she leaves the lid gets knocked shut
 which is why i never caught onto her scam. she's fucking been working
 the system and playing the food game right under my fucking nose like i
 want to scream and now I have to call the vet and the morning and explain
 to him how, a well educated adult in college. got one-upped in
 intelligence by my fucking cat
 Read the whole thing
what kind of posts do u want cause my stats been like bye bye

what kind of posts do u want cause my stats been like bye bye

Android, Bad, and Chill: When you tell your boyfriend a joke and the girl under his bed starts laughing too Never forget your girls favorite color. I canโ€™t explain why dudes cheat but answer this, if you got money in your wallet and you find another dollar, are you not going to pick it up? Long story short my girl was out of town at her friends graduation. She left me a spear key to come feed her dog through out the week. I did the opposite, I treated him like Gary the snail. I had my side girl over bout to get busy. You know that deep gut feeling that tells you โ€œight chill outโ€ but you ignore it? That be God mercy tryna save you. Iโ€™m catching some bomb neck, Iโ€™m talking about My meat going through a 5 star car wash when I hear a engine pull up out front. I look out the window and see my girl hop out a Uber. My side girl hid under the bed. I can tell She done this before. I slid under the sheets and fake sleep. My girl comes in talking about she changed her flight to come home sooner. Android users text take 3 business days. Babe starts asking me whatโ€™s her favorite color. I confidently blurted our magenta. Here comes her dog with a red thong in his mouth. Damn dogs canโ€™t stick together? The FBI agent in her came out and starts interrogating me. Under her sheets Iโ€™m getting my dick rode by bed bugs during the interrogation process. Im tryna figure how to get this girl out this crib before Iโ€™m toast. My girl mid way through her sentence when you hear a sneeze under her bed. Within seconds my girl downloaded a heart beat sensor. I swear Android users got it good. This is now modern warfare. I watch my girl play search&destroy with my side chick. Side chicks heartless so she couldnโ€™t detect her. Me being the real nigga I am had to flip the whole situation on her. โ€œI donโ€™t like how you assume me as a black man cheat, if you donโ€™t trust me Idk about thisโ€ Tears in my eyes because it smelled like fish cakes and my eyes couldnโ€™t take it. My girl felt bad and hit me with the double hand twist Gawk combo. My girl said she was coming back Sunday and came back Friday. She lied to me. I canโ€™t date liars fam. I broke up with her. Iโ€™m single and my side girl still live under my ex bed. She text me from time to time for help. Shoulda had a escape rope.
Android, Bad, and Chill: When you tell your boyfriend a joke
 and the girl under his bed starts
 laughing too
Never forget your girls favorite color. I canโ€™t explain why dudes cheat but answer this, if you got money in your wallet and you find another dollar, are you not going to pick it up? Long story short my girl was out of town at her friends graduation. She left me a spear key to come feed her dog through out the week. I did the opposite, I treated him like Gary the snail. I had my side girl over bout to get busy. You know that deep gut feeling that tells you โ€œight chill outโ€ but you ignore it? That be God mercy tryna save you. Iโ€™m catching some bomb neck, Iโ€™m talking about My meat going through a 5 star car wash when I hear a engine pull up out front. I look out the window and see my girl hop out a Uber. My side girl hid under the bed. I can tell She done this before. I slid under the sheets and fake sleep. My girl comes in talking about she changed her flight to come home sooner. Android users text take 3 business days. Babe starts asking me whatโ€™s her favorite color. I confidently blurted our magenta. Here comes her dog with a red thong in his mouth. Damn dogs canโ€™t stick together? The FBI agent in her came out and starts interrogating me. Under her sheets Iโ€™m getting my dick rode by bed bugs during the interrogation process. Im tryna figure how to get this girl out this crib before Iโ€™m toast. My girl mid way through her sentence when you hear a sneeze under her bed. Within seconds my girl downloaded a heart beat sensor. I swear Android users got it good. This is now modern warfare. I watch my girl play search&destroy with my side chick. Side chicks heartless so she couldnโ€™t detect her. Me being the real nigga I am had to flip the whole situation on her. โ€œI donโ€™t like how you assume me as a black man cheat, if you donโ€™t trust me Idk about thisโ€ Tears in my eyes because it smelled like fish cakes and my eyes couldnโ€™t take it. My girl felt bad and hit me with the double hand twist Gawk combo. My girl said she was coming back Sunday and came back Friday. She lied to me. I canโ€™t date liars fam. I broke up with her. Iโ€™m single and my side girl still live under my ex bed. She text me from time to time for help. Shoulda had a escape rope.

Never forget your girls favorite color. I canโ€™t explain why dudes cheat but answer this, if you got money in your wallet and you find anothe...