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Being Alone, Beautiful, and Bodies : I can build an inpenetratable wall around Asgard. Only thing I want as payment is the goddess of love, Freya.. Okay everybody, calm down. This isn't the first time a jotun wanted me for his bride I'm used to this problem by now and we just gotta- and the beautiful Sun and sexy Moon. YOU WANT ME AS PART OF A HAREM!!?!?! I'VE NEVER BEEN SO DISRESPECTED!!!! systlin: would-we-be-friends-if-i: thehmn: In case you don’t know this story, the Norse gods wanted a wall around Asgard to protect themselves and a jotun only known as The Builder offers to make it in exchange for Freya, Sun and Moon. Freya gets rightfully pissed and refuses (no word on Sun or Moon’s feelings about this), so Loki turns into a female horse and lures The Builder’s horse away, causing all work on the wall to stop. Because he can’t finish the wall The Builder has to leave without Freya, Sun and Moon. Loki disappears for 9 nine months and returns with an eight-legged foal (yes, he had sex with the horse and got pregnant. I know you all love that part). The end. For some reason people often leave out that The Builder wanted Sun and Moon too, and English translations often translate it to “the sun and moon” as if he wanted the heavenly bodies, but no, he wanted the goddess and god responsible for said heavenly bodies. He absolutely intended to have sex with all of them which is why a lot of translations leave out Moon because ew that’s gay. Freya didn’t want to marry a Jotun, let alone as part of a god damn harem me thinks. Hoooold up are you telling me the Sun is female in Norse myth? Cuz its usually male, across other mythology. Yep. Mani is the god of the moon, and Sol is the goddess of the sun in Norse myth.
Being Alone, Beautiful, and Bodies : I can build an inpenetratable wall
 around Asgard. Only thing I want as payment
 is the goddess of love, Freya..
 Okay everybody, calm down.
 This isn't the first time a jotun
 wanted me for his bride
 I'm used to this problem by
 now and we just gotta-
 and the beautiful Sun and sexy Moon.

 YOU WANT ME AS PART OF A HAREM!!?!?!
 I'VE NEVER BEEN SO DISRESPECTED!!!!
systlin:
would-we-be-friends-if-i:

thehmn:

In case you don’t know this story, the Norse gods wanted a wall around Asgard to protect themselves and a jotun only known as The Builder offers to make it in exchange for Freya, Sun and Moon. Freya gets rightfully pissed and refuses (no word on Sun or Moon’s feelings about this), so Loki turns into a female horse and lures The Builder’s horse away, causing all work on the wall to stop. Because he can’t finish the wall The Builder has to leave without Freya, Sun and Moon. Loki disappears for 9 nine months and returns with an eight-legged foal (yes, he had sex with the horse and got pregnant. I know you all love that part). The end.
For some reason people often leave out that The Builder wanted Sun and Moon too, and English translations often translate it to “the sun and moon” as if he wanted the heavenly bodies, but no, he wanted the goddess and god responsible for said heavenly bodies. He absolutely intended to have sex with all of them which is why a lot of translations leave out Moon because ew that’s gay.
Freya didn’t want to marry a Jotun, let alone as part of a god damn harem me thinks.


Hoooold up are you telling me the Sun is female in Norse myth? Cuz its usually male, across other mythology. 

Yep. Mani is the god of the moon, and Sol is the goddess of the sun in Norse myth.

systlin: would-we-be-friends-if-i: thehmn: In case you don’t know this story, the Norse gods wanted a wall around Asgard to protect themse...

Birthday, Comfortable, and Confidence: reddit-tales What has been your worst "nice guy" experience? So, possibly one of the coolest things I've ever seen. I mean you know how you hear the "women want him, men want to *be* him" stuff in old movies? Well I'm a man and by *god* I wanted to be this guy. Anyway! I'm having dinner with my girlfriend at the time, and behind us are a couple on a not going well. Guy was being I rather inappropriate comments, the girl doesn't look at all comfortable. The girl finishes her appetiser really quickly my guess is she wanted to get it over with. Guy proceeds to comment on it and says "well, least I know you can swallow right?" Loudly Girl goes red and tells him that isn't appropriate, he literally waves his hand in a "shoo" type motion and says "oh calm down I was going to find out in a few hours anyway" I missed her exact re as she moved to a hushed tone, but it was fairly obvious what was being said-fuck no, fuck off, fuck this. He responded with "sweetheart I picked lost the colour in her face and said nothing. No. No. Fuck no. I'm one of those "get involved" type of people and there is no way I'm sitting here watching this go down. I get up. I don't know what I'm going to do, but I'm 23, fighting fit and happy to put that motherfucker through a wall. I may have had a slight temper in my youth. But anyway. I was halfway out of my chair when a hand came down on my shoulder and I look up to this mid-50s but super fit guy who says "Easy. I've got this one son". Absolute, total confidence in his voice.. so seeing as my current plan amounted to "stab him in the neck" and I'm already thinking maybe that's not the best idea, I sit down. He walks over, grabs a nearby chair, flips it around and sits down with the couple. Then.. he pulls out his police ID and puts it on the table. Now the guy doesn't have any colour in his face Cop: "So, I'm quietly celebrating my daughters birthday with my family when I distinctly hear you threaten this young lady, would you care to explain yourself?" Guy: "I, ah, well, um, you see. Cop: "That's what I thought. Now see, we take a *very* dim view of that kind of thing, so right now I'm deciding if I want to have some of my buddies come pick you up" Guy: "oh no well that..." Cop: "But that would disrupt everyone's dinner, so how about you hand me your ID, me, the dn't want yhe staff here and settle your bill., the full bill now, this young lady shouldn't go hungry on account of your poor behaviour. Or we can go with the first option, I'll leave it up to you. Guy: "No no! That's perfectly fine!" 1*hands over ID, gets up and walks very quickly in the direction of the counter Cop: while writing down the guys details 1* "Sorry about that miss, I hope I'm not intruding it just seemed like you could use some help. Oh and don't worry, if you want to pursue this further I'll have some of the boys pick him up on his way home, we can definitely take this further. Girl: "No, thank you so much, I wanted to run out 30 minutes ago but he drove me here". Cop: *shifts from hardarse cop to comforting father figure in about half a second* "Well I'm here with my daughter, she's about your age, perhaps you'd like to finish your meal with us? We can run you home afterwards if you'd like, unless you'd prefer to call someone else?" Girl: "Oh.. that would be really nice.. thankyou so much! *guy returns, so does the hardarse cop* Guy: "Uh so, I've paid the bill, if I could have back.". my Cop: "There you go. now I have your details right here so I *highly* recommend you don't go near or contact this young lady ever again. Guy: "Yes yes of course, I'm so sorry!" The quy pretty much fled the restaurant, the qirl went and sat with the cop and his family and by the time we left they were still sitting around talking and laughing about random crap. It was hands down the best way I have ever seen anybody handle any situation, ever. That cop is my hero. malicemanaged Dude. I hope that man has a great rest of his life. Wholesome cop via /r/wholesomememes https://ift.tt/2SkCLRT
Birthday, Comfortable, and Confidence: reddit-tales
 What has been your worst
 "nice guy" experience?
 So, possibly one of the coolest things I've
 ever seen. I mean you know how you hear the
 "women want him, men want to *be* him"
 stuff in old movies? Well I'm a man and by
 *god* I wanted to be this guy. Anyway!
 I'm having dinner with my girlfriend at
 the time, and behind us are a couple on a
 not going well. Guy was being
 I
 rather
 inappropriate comments, the girl doesn't
 look at all comfortable.
 The girl finishes her appetiser really quickly
 my guess is she wanted to get it over with.
 Guy proceeds to comment on it and says
 "well, least I know you can swallow right?"
 Loudly
 Girl goes red and tells him that isn't
 appropriate, he literally waves his hand in
 a "shoo" type motion and says "oh calm
 down I was going to find out in a few hours
 anyway"
 I missed her exact re
 as she moved to a
 hushed tone, but it was fairly obvious what
 was being said-fuck no, fuck off, fuck this.
 He responded with "sweetheart I picked
 lost the
 colour in her face and said nothing.
 No. No. Fuck no. I'm one of those "get
 involved" type of people and there is no way
 I'm sitting here watching this go down. I get
 up. I don't know what I'm going to do, but
 I'm 23, fighting fit and happy to put that
 motherfucker through a wall. I may have had
 a slight temper in my youth. But anyway.
 I was halfway out of my chair when a hand
 came down on my shoulder and I look up
 to this mid-50s but super fit guy who says
 "Easy. I've got this one son". Absolute, total
 confidence in his voice.. so seeing as my
 current plan amounted to "stab him in the
 neck" and I'm already thinking maybe that's
 not the best idea, I sit down.
 He walks over, grabs a nearby chair, flips it
 around and sits down with the couple. Then..
 he pulls out his police ID and puts it on the
 table. Now the guy doesn't have any colour in
 his face
 Cop: "So, I'm quietly celebrating my
 daughters birthday with my family when I
 distinctly hear you threaten this young lady,
 would you care to explain yourself?"
 Guy: "I, ah, well, um, you see.
 Cop: "That's what I thought. Now see, we
 take a *very* dim view of that kind of thing,
 so right now I'm deciding if I want to have
 some of my buddies come pick you up"
 Guy: "oh no well that..."
 Cop: "But that would disrupt everyone's
 dinner, so how about you hand me your ID,
 me, the dn't want yhe staff here and
 settle your bill., the full bill now, this young
 lady shouldn't go hungry on account of your
 poor behaviour. Or we can go with the first
 option, I'll leave it up to you.
 Guy: "No no! That's perfectly fine!" 1*hands
 over ID, gets up and walks very quickly in the
 direction of the counter
 Cop: while writing down the guys details
 1* "Sorry about that miss, I hope I'm not
 intruding it just seemed like you could use
 some help. Oh and don't worry, if you want
 to pursue this further I'll have some of the
 boys pick him up on his way home, we can
 definitely take this further.
 Girl: "No, thank you so much, I wanted to run
 out 30 minutes ago but he drove me here".
 Cop: *shifts from hardarse cop to
 comforting father figure in about half a
 second* "Well I'm here with my daughter,
 she's about your age, perhaps you'd like to
 finish your meal with us? We can run you
 home afterwards if you'd like, unless you'd
 prefer to call someone else?"
 Girl: "Oh.. that would be really nice.. thankyou
 so much!
 *guy returns, so does the hardarse cop*
 Guy: "Uh so, I've paid the bill, if I could have
 back.".
 my
 Cop: "There you go. now I have your details
 right here so I *highly* recommend you
 don't go near or contact this young lady ever
 again.
 Guy: "Yes yes of course, I'm so sorry!"
 The quy pretty much fled the restaurant, the
 qirl went and sat with the cop and his family
 and by the time we left they were still sitting
 around talking and laughing about random
 crap.
 It was hands down the best way I have ever
 seen anybody handle any situation, ever. That
 cop is my hero.
 malicemanaged
 Dude. I hope that man has a great rest of his
 life.
Wholesome cop via /r/wholesomememes https://ift.tt/2SkCLRT

Wholesome cop via /r/wholesomememes https://ift.tt/2SkCLRT

Bad, Fucking, and Funny: There's a thing called "Rubber duck debugging" in which a programmer explains the code to a rubber duck in hopes of finding the bug Ultrafacts.tumblr.com ultrafacts tmblr.com ATultrafacts Source absorr Some of you are reblogging because you think its funny that programmers would talk to ducks. I'm reblogging because I think its funny picturing a programmer explaining their code, realizing what they did when they explain the bad code, then grabbing the strangling the duck while yelling "WHY WAS THE FIX THAT SIMPLE!? AM I GOING BLIND!" monobeartheater AS A PROGRAMMER I CAN TELL YOU THAT THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT YOU FUCKING DO WE HAD TO BAN THE DUCKS FROM MY CLASSES BECAUSE EVERYONE WOULD FLIP THE DUCK OR THROW IT AT A WALL OR SOMETHING WHEN THEY FIGURED OUT THE PROBLEM IN THEIR CODE kierenwalkerpds so that's the function of a rubber duck lifeofdavo ΑΛΛΛΛΛΛΛΛΛΛΑ cosrnos work at a startup and part of the onboarding package you get when you first start working here now includes a rubber duck. We also have a bigger version of the duck for the extra hard problems. Sometimes one duck doesn't cut it and you need to borrow your neighbors to get more ducks on the problem. One time we couldn't figure out why something wasn't working right so we assembled the counsel of ducks and by the grace of the Duck Gods were we able to finally come to a solution. These ducks have saved many lives and should be respected for the heroes they are. May the Duck Gods watch over you.
Bad, Fucking, and Funny: There's a thing called "Rubber duck
 debugging" in which a programmer
 explains the code to a rubber duck in
 hopes of finding the bug
 Ultrafacts.tumblr.com
 ultrafacts tmblr.com
 ATultrafacts
 Source
 absorr
 Some of you are reblogging because you
 think its funny that programmers would talk
 to ducks. I'm reblogging because I think its
 funny picturing a programmer explaining
 their code, realizing what they did when
 they explain the bad code, then grabbing
 the strangling the duck while yelling "WHY
 WAS THE FIX THAT SIMPLE!? AM I GOING
 BLIND!"
 monobeartheater
 AS A PROGRAMMER I CAN TELL YOU
 THAT THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT YOU
 FUCKING DO WE HAD TO BAN THE DUCKS
 FROM MY CLASSES BECAUSE EVERYONE
 WOULD FLIP THE DUCK OR THROW IT AT
 A WALL OR SOMETHING WHEN THEY
 FIGURED OUT THE PROBLEM IN THEIR
 CODE
 kierenwalkerpds
 so that's the function of a rubber duck
 lifeofdavo
 ΑΛΛΛΛΛΛΛΛΛΛΑ
 cosrnos
 work at a startup and part of the
 onboarding package you get when you first
 start working here now includes a rubber
 duck. We also have a bigger version of the
 duck for the extra hard problems.
 Sometimes one duck doesn't cut it and you
 need to borrow your neighbors to get more
 ducks on the problem. One time we
 couldn't figure out why something wasn't
 working right so we assembled the counsel
 of ducks and by the grace of the Duck Gods
 were we able to finally come to a solution.
 These ducks have saved many lives and
 should be respected for the heroes they
 are.
May the Duck Gods watch over you.

May the Duck Gods watch over you.

Children, Girls, and Life: To you, my Father, why do you hate girls? systlin: appropriately-inappropriate: kittiesatemypronouns: r1vk4: ‘To you, my Father, who do you hate girls? With the same hatred you hate our Mothers…’ In the village of Umoja in Kenya, men are not welcome. In fact, they are banned. In Swahili, one of Kenya’s official languages, Umoja means unity. It is a safe and inspirational refuge for 50 women and 200 children. Umoja was founded in 1990 by female survivors of rape and sexual violence. It has also become a haven for women fleeing sexual and domestic violence, and welcomes people fleeing female genital mutilation, child marriage, and more. ‘I wouldnt wish any Maasai girl to go through what I went through.’ The local Samburu culture is patriarchal where historically women are seen as property. Beading is culturally significant and the women are able to support themselves by selling crafts. Protected by a wall of thorns, the village is self-sufficient and the women run their own lives. Despite resistance from local male-run tribal groups, the village continues to grow. Life is frugal, but the women own the land the village is on and proudly call Umoja their home. A beacon of light for women, Umoja has inspired other women-only villages in Kenya.  - Umoja: The Town Where Men Are Banned They are making and selling jewelry online now! ☺☺ https://umojajewellery.com/ Oh fuck I want the jewelry. That’s gonna be gifted to everyone come holiday season. Welp time to buy some jewelry
Children, Girls, and Life: To you, my Father, why do you hate girls?
systlin:
appropriately-inappropriate:

kittiesatemypronouns:


r1vk4:

‘To you, my Father, who do you hate girls? With the same hatred you hate our Mothers…’
In the village of Umoja in Kenya, men are not welcome. In fact, they are banned. In Swahili, one of Kenya’s official languages, Umoja means unity. It is a safe and inspirational refuge for 50 women and 200 children. Umoja was founded in 1990 by female survivors of rape and sexual violence. It has also become a haven for women fleeing sexual and domestic violence, and welcomes people fleeing female genital mutilation, child marriage, and more.
‘I wouldnt wish any Maasai girl to go through what I went through.’
The local Samburu culture is patriarchal where historically women are seen as property. Beading is culturally significant and the women are able to support themselves by selling crafts. Protected by a wall of thorns, the village is self-sufficient and the women run their own lives. Despite resistance from local male-run tribal groups, the village continues to grow. Life is frugal, but the women own the land the village is on and proudly call Umoja their home. A beacon of light for women, Umoja has inspired other women-only villages in Kenya. 
- Umoja: The Town Where Men Are Banned


They are making and selling jewelry online now! ☺☺
https://umojajewellery.com/


Oh fuck I want the jewelry. That’s gonna be gifted to everyone come holiday season. 

Welp time to buy some jewelry

systlin: appropriately-inappropriate: kittiesatemypronouns: r1vk4: ‘To you, my Father, who do you hate girls? With the same hatred you h...